Jack

This would kill on HIGNFY

I think the problem with politicians these days is that they *don't* want to see bigger boobs. There's a palpable tit-fear in Westminster and I'm not afraid to say it.

Anythings better than the #TakeNoShitMP bit she used to do.

Thought he's love this shit tbf. Badgers on pound notes is very Lib Dem coded.

James Ball is really concerned about honesty and integrity from our politicians. Wha-? Starmer and Mandleson? Noooo of course not. He's rehashing boobgate again - A real controversy of real consequence.

james is such a fucking weasel.

he never says this about keir starmer and keir starmer lies to the point of murdering, via policy, british citizens.

"I think he deserves to be replaced by a badger."

The whole point of this report delay was to fob it off as 'oh this is old news' when it got confirmed that Starmer knew Mandelson's pedophile connections and all his sycophants are all to willing to play along.

“One specific exchange that is understood to have been blocked from release includes the three questions Starmer put directly to Mandelson about how he maintained his friendship with Epstein.”

🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀🐀

Damn that's a whole Mandelson severance pay's worth!

Say something like: Starmer showed Serious Leadership. Mandelson asked for £500k but like a True Negotiator he vigorously beat him down to a mere £75k.

Then they'll say 'Farage was poor there. He was #Skewered by James O'brien* while he managed to fire of another 5 dogwhistles to his audience.

*swap for any fash-enabling centrist chancer

Omid looking in the fridge at some chocolate: "Ah! Some delicious transphobia. No, but I mustn't... Well. Just one bite perhapss. What's the worst that can happen?"

"Henceforth, by solemn vow and steadfast will, I consign my dignity to a most peculiar ritual: that with each new day I shall faithfully and without fail shit my pants. Omid shitting himself

The Suffering of Omid Djalili.

This is why politics live in a different world. Because you and I look at that and think 'wow what an arrogant prick' whereas they say 'hmm yes, clever. Forensic evasion and such a subtle counterjab!'

I know people will dismiss this as standard 'PMQs Speak' but I can't think of many people that wouldn't get aggressively angry if people spoke like this to them.

'Hu-Why do the poors hate noble Sir Keir so much????"

Plus the most successful politician of the 21st century talks in total gibberish.

Tuning in for another #Blinder

Mandelson documents to be released after PMQs

Wonder why.

Had one in my mentions yesterday with 'the US and Israel have *actually* targeted a lot of strategic military bases' I rpelied but then blocked instead. I'm old enough to recognise when someone is just trying to waste my time.

The Sunday Friend from Disco Elysium. He's doing the iconic 'concerned liberal' face

Labour supporters don't even tell you they'll Stop Reform anymore they just look at you like this:

Labour voters still think the can frame themselves as the good guys. Like more of this cruelty and cowardice is something to aspire to. They are gross inhumane cunts and I hate them.

Um no I think you'll find we have a Labour Government so these things don't actually exist anymore.

All this achieves is confusing well-meaning friends family members when they try to pick up food for you

Wife: "How many dinosaurs can you name."
4yo: "I think... 15."
W: "wow 15? Can you name them?"
4yo: "Yeah. 1) Joey... "

Honestly at times there are times it attempts a joke and lands it which really makes me wonder if they decided on quasi parody but didnt tell everyone involved.

Didn't reallt rate this. Feel like it couldn't decide whether it was taking itself seriously or not.

We're seeing hitherto untold levels of Spursisity.

Yeah they managed to get that really dangerous looking girls school...

New York Post 'USA wins 1-1' in reference to England drawing with the US after a career defining howler from Rob Green

It won't though. Just get this but for global politics