Melissa Blue

But the main one is I am awkward bc I am an outsider, I am partially an outsider bc I don't know how to be a human. The infinite loop.

On so many levels.

Today I am just upset that I can't call my sis and say, "Do you know what :your: mother called me to say? At 6 a.m."

I am an Aries. I will forever have this grudge.

Us being estranged doesn't matter. A truce should be available so I can say "YOUR MOTHER."

Something happened this morning that made me realize I so relate to the murderbot series bc I have to put on my humanity hat before dealing with other humans.

Daylights saving. Ew.

K thru 8.

When I came out with 50+, probably 100+, she didn't realize I had come up with an efficient system.

Bc trial and error.

Based on their reaction, they'll never ask me again.

But this will be the best ice pack these kids will get. Lololol

As an aside (hilarious one),my bosses asked me to make the cheap/impromptu ice packs.

It is simply wet, brown, thick napkins in cheap sandwich bags. Frozen.

One of the bosses handed me a stack of both. She told me to make as many as you can.

I confirmed with hèr HOW MANY?

As many as you can.

It really just made me realize how wonderfully random life can be.

If nothing else!!!!!

This week was worth it.

I just barely survived a hell week from work, but I am looking forward to going back.

How? Why?

A co-worker has a yarn stash she needs to give away.

Guess who volunteered to receive it?

!!!

#yarnwh4re

I have gotten so much better at that, but also, I now freeze a lot too.

a man in a red shirt is standing in front of a television in a room . ALT: a man in a red shirt is standing in front of a television in a room .

No.

For the first time in my 40yrs of living, I live by myself.

Feels weird.

Highly.

But also hilarious.

a man in a black shirt is standing in a room and says `` it 's jake from state farm '' ALT: a man in a black shirt is standing in a room and says `` it 's jake from state farm ''

Son unexpectedly came home as I was about to head off to work. I am wearing a red shirt.

He looked me up and down then said, "Where's your khakis, mom?"

I'll give one guess where I work.

I take back everything I said last night. Fuck these kids. Lol

It's the only damn thing he won't take with him yet. He is using the excuse he hasn't moved yet.

TAKE THE DAMN HORSE WITH YOU!!!!

I hate it here. Being a mother means voluntary heartbreak.

The last time one of my children moved out I spent months sleeping in their bed and eating Oreos for comfort.

I don't like sweets.

Please keep me in your thoughts during this trying time.

My son is officially moving out on the 9th. Unofficially, for months, he has barely been home.

So I know it's all a mental thing, but every time I pass by his empty room, I hate everything about my children being all "growned" up.

My first real job, that I sorta kinda succeeded at, was my dream job. My absolute passion. I would do it for free. I did it for free, many years.

In my 20s, someone I looked up to--and they did love me--told me I was spoiled. I was aghast.

Now, at 40, I believe them.

In retrospect, the hardest thing about finding a job is that I kept hoping to find a new passion. I kept looking for something, anything that would be on par to me being a writer.

Would I do this job for free? Can I do this job for 10+ hrs a day and still feel fulfilled?

Some piece of paper or plastic got stuck in my small desk fan.

I glared at it and said, "SHUT UP. SHUT THE FUCK UP." I promptly turned it off.

I think I might be a bit, just a smidge, overstimulated from my day.

Let me emotionally regulate for a min.

Be proud of your brown paper bag!!!

Yeah. I have :finally: started my stockpile of reusable bags.

And that bag is probably tied up tighter than Fort Knox. Cause how do they still even have some? Why is that knot so damn tight?

I remember the bag was almost bursting with the condoms and birth control.

They clearly had options for a bigger bag. They didn't choose them.

So California has doubled down, and you can only find a plastic bag at corner stores/Mom and Pops.

I will leave a big box store with a brown paper bag.

I have two thoughts and feelings:

BYOB

and

Planned Parenthood clearly didn't have big enough brown paper bags.

I did not realize just how spoiled I was cracking into cozy games by way of Stardew Valley and Animal Crossing.

There are hundreds, if not thousands, of how to's on YT. There are wikis with ACCURATE info.

One of the most ironic life lessons I learned is that unpacking your factory settings (inherent and taught beliefs, etc.) is vital, but by doing that you realize the humans in this world don't exactly deserve a better you.