Ivan Oozer 🔞

You’ll shoot your eye out, kid. #WetWednesday

You’ll shoot your eye out, kid. #WetWednesday

Today is National Napping Day, but it’s more like National Fapping Day since I can’t stop scrolling through all y’all’s fantastically fuzzy #TummyTuesday posts.

I’d probably make a popular bartender thanks to my heavy pours. #MonochromeMonday

My pillowcase wasn’t ready for #SundayCumday.

Trying to nap off the time change but this lil bastard won’t let me.

It’s getting wet in the shower, and I haven’t even turned on the water yet. #SoftCockSaturday

Trouble with the Curve (2012, dir: Clint Eastwood) #FatCockFriday

Trouble with the Curve (2012, dir: Clint Eastwood) #FatCockFriday

Wake and shake.

Repost with your dick root.

How I arrived on Bluesky.

My impression of a compass pointing south-southwest. #TummyTuesday

He always did enjoy a good squeeze. #MonochromeMonday #MCM

Well, that was aggressive. #SundayCumday

Alexa, play “Kiss Them for Me" by Siouxsie and the Banshees.

#SoftCockSaturday is gonna get pretty hard if I keep touching my nipples.

Shaken AND stirred. #FatCockFriday

I’m basically a Muppet. #Fursday

A cock in the hand is worth two (drips) in the bush. #WetWednesday

Quick question: Am I legally obligated to show navel on #TummyTuesday, or is this okay?

My favorite black-and-white movie is Furtigo. #MonochromeMonday

Face reveal. Wrong answers only.

“Fuck” sums it up nicely. #SundayCumday

Chucking around. #SoftCockSaturday #SCS

Today is Clean Out Your Bookcase Day, but this lil devil seems to have other plans. #FatCockFriday #FCF

I could go for a little heavy petting tonight. #Fursday

It’s #WetWednesday! Don’t forget to moisturize your thighs!

Tell me you’re hairy without telling me you’re hairy. 👀