Paul Bassett Davies

Just finished “Dead Writers in Rehab” by Paul Bassett Davies. Enjoyed it immensely, would recommend. @thewritertype.bsky.social

Thanks, I’m very pleased to hear you enjoyed it.

Have you always dreamed of owning a private island? A reminder on International Bagpipe Day that any island can be a private island if you have enough patience and a set of bagpipes.

Yeah, yeah. Don’t start.

Some people like opera and ballet, some don’t. No need to make a big song and dance about it.

If Trump is convinced he wins all wars regardless of the actual outcome, maybe he could simply declare he’s won before he starts them, and skip all the bloodshed.

Coming soon: the dark ages.

Wow, Americans turned their clocks forward but we don't change ours in the UK until the end of the month! And they pronounce "tomato" as "elevator", and their word for "trousers" is "sidewalk"! So much for the special relationship! Also their government is a bunch of fascists.

If you're looking for the Loch Ness monster, stop calling it a monster. No wonder it's hiding. How would you like being called a monster? You're much more likely to find it if you call it something like Sexy Supersize Mystery Water Creature. Basic psychology, mate. You're welcome.

You may be asking why we still need an International Women's Day in 2026. If so, that's why.

One last push…

Looks like the West might be about to learn, once again, that the best time to devise an exit strategy is before you enter the burning building, not when you’re inside, on fire, holding a flamethrower instead of an extinguisher.

god only knows.

Is there any real chance of a reaching a peace deal in a war where one side are irrational religious zealots operating under a repressive theocracy, and so are the other two.

Trump's unique strategic approach to waging war can be summed up as: "Bomb first, find out why you did it later."

NEWS: Trump fires loathsome fascist ghoul from cabinet!
ME: Nope, still no idea. You'll have to narrow it down.

It’s World Book Day and I’m dressed as the protagonist of my autobiography.

I’m English. I live in the UK. Not everything on this site is about Americans.

If you didn’t know it’s World Book Day maybe you didn’t see the notice in your local library that’s been closed down.

Don’t throw away old pyjamas. Collect as many pairs as you can, and in the middle of the night spread them out on Pete Hegseth’s front lawn so that when he wakes up he’ll think he missed the Rapture.

Only at a quantum level.

That’s exactly what they want you to think

Oh no, I hope you’re not suffering from phantom reflux.

Steady on, we simply can’t be sure on that one.

Please be aware that Keir Starmer is not Winston Churchill. Vladimir Putin is not Catherine the Great. Tom is not Jerry. Ghosts are not edible. Hummingbirds are not mousetraps. Clouds are not underpants. Things are not what they seem. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Melania Trump is chairing a UN Security Council meeting on behalf of the United States. Next month the position rotates to Denmark, who will be represented by a box of Lego.

Trump has no plan. Welcome to World War III, the improv show from Hell.

Delighted to hear it. I hope you continue to enjoy.

When life gives you lemurs, don’t attempt to make lemurade. Lemurs are surprisingly powerful for their size, and can become aggressive.

Trump: we had some smart people selected to form Iran’s next government but we accidentally blew them up. So, we’re looking for some more smart people.

*tumbleweed*

Trump: we’ll try not to blow you up.

*deserted saloon door creaks*

Trump: hey where is everyone?