roach’s malewife

Photograph of three shaggy blond heads of plush dolls looking at a website that’s auctioning them

Photograph of three naked plush dolls with shaggy blond hair and bow tie shoes. One in the middle is missing legs. Behind them is a computer screen showing a website where they are being auctioned.

The Stedes are asking me if anyone’s adopted them yet. I told them not yet because 1) the craft fair isn’t over, 2) they’re still naked, and 3) one of them doesn’t have legs yet. They also want to know which is A, B, and C. Links 🔗 to all 3 below 👇 #fandommarket @ourfamilyourfight.bsky.social

if u love gay people, why not grab yourself a set of crocheted pride flag coasters handmade by meeeeeee 💕

www.32auctions.com/organization...

thats really awesome, thank you so much, i will definitely keep this in mind 💖

if you are still interested, i can reach out when i have a real draft!

oh god let me just be clear the only stuff i know about robotics/engineering i learned ten years ago from one college class i am verrry much approaching this as a humanities bitch making stuff up based on wikipedia research 💀💀💀 im doing sci fi with fantasy rules all the way down. that being said—

did i tell the bsky people about robotics engineer ed and the android boyfriend he built himself. ed just did robo surgery on stede while promising they would be friends forever. good shit is happening in my doc

we love transformative works in this fandom, so here's one more:

for every $10 donated to the craft fair shipping fund, you can get a raffle entry to win AN AMIGURUMI GOOFY CHICKEN (wip pictured)

just donate to the OFOF kofi, then submit your receipt/confirmation here: forms.gle/P7Jin8oX2BCs...

Custom Mermaid Tail Blanket by Pastor_of_Muppets Auction item 'Custom Mermaid Tail Blanket by Pastor_of_Muppets' hosted online at 32auctions.

Don't want to spend $4k on a funky chicken? How about a much more modest donation for a cozy blanket where you can re-enact one of the most stunning scenes in S2? It's a commission because you can have teal or purple and YES orange is an option and YES it can/will come with a bum heart!

Post a banger not in english:

youtu.be/Ygz8y0ualg8?... everyone get chaiyya chaiyya pilled immediately. We all need to be chaiyya chaiyya maxxing

i love you guys. somehow gerby is at $39. stede is really happy his clumsy sewing job has won so many hearts and minds

everyone get ready to fight for the death for gerby www.32auctions.com/organization...

A screenshot of an Ao3 fic titled "as life gets longer, awful feels softer" By tragicallynerdy Summary: Ed has TMJ. It complicates things. Sex, alright, sex, it complicates sex, because Ed likes oral sex, he likes it a whole fucking lot, so sue him. But it's fine, whatever, he can just take a break from giving blowjobs and eating people out, he can baby his jaw and he won't be in any pain. Well, he won't be in more pain than his usual chronic pain. Excellent plan, 10/10 no notes. Until he meets Stede. And then he's in love, and horny about it, and he wants to give Stede blowjobs like all the fucking time. Well. Shit.

A screenshot of tumblr tags for this fic. They include: OFMD, Ed Teach/Stede Bonnet. Additional tags: smut, disability, character study, TMJ, trans Edward Teach, trans male Ed Teach, trans Stede Bonnet, t4t Ed/Stede, oral sex, vaginal sex, grinding, thigh riding, strap ons, gender affirming sex, gender euphoria, chronic pain, established relationships, but newer established relationships, minor meetcute inclusion, mild hurt/comfort, sucking the strap, Ed Teach is Down Bad for Stede Bonnet, POV Ed Teach, Ed Teach has ADHD, author plays fast and loose with terms for people’s junk, breaking the fourth wall, Ed Teach's knee injury, disabled Ed Teach The fic is 19,151 words long.

pspsps hey #Gentlebeard ies, come get your t4t TMJ Ed/Stede smutty disability-focused character study!! because Ed deserves to eat Stede out forever amen

i'm not a GB author, this is my first purely Ed/Stede smut fic, so please enjoy this rare treat

#OFMDfic

archiveofourown.org/works/80525676

Graphic for the fic Not Only the Sugar, but the Days by adhduck. The background is of peaches and the title is in white lettering with pink background. Summary: “I wanna go on a date with you.” Stede snorted into Ed’s hair. “You’ve gone on a lot of dates with me, love. We were just on one a few hours ago, remember?” “Barely, after that,” Ed sighed, hips shifting as if in memory. “But no, I meant like—like a date date.” Raising an eyebrow even though Ed couldn’t see it, Stede asked, “What’s a date date?” “You know, like—what teenagers go on. Ask each other out, bring flowers, go to the movies or something. That kind of shit.”

Graphic for the same fic with the same background. Additional tags: Alternate universe - modern setting, Established relationship, Fluff, Childhood friends, 5+1 energy but not in that exact format, Dates, First dates (sort of), Non-sexual roleplay, (aka vicariously living out your teenage dreams as middle-aged men), Making out, Two boys (pretend to) learn to kiss each other, Hand holding, The inherent intimacy and eroticism of hands, Also the inherent intimacy and eroticism of peaches, References to sex, Autistic Stede Bonnet, Edward Teach has adhd, Trans Edward Teach, (it doesn't come up much but it's so important you know this), Ed and Stede are SO in love and they WILL be annoying about it, Unabashed use of 90s music, Podfic welcome

i realized today is exactly two years since my second blossom boys fic 🥺i love them so so so much time is crazy

archiveofourown.org/works/54005953

YESSSS HAHA YESSSSS HA HA YESSSSSS

E Fucked to Death by the 04 Mar 2026 Gentleman Pirate - A Love Story by ingydar Our Flag Means Death (TV) No Archive Warnings Apply, Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Stede Bonnet, Lucius Spriggs, Rimming, Felching, Anal Fingering, Self Confidence Issues, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Our Flag Means Death (TV) Season/Series 01, how do they end up together....? who's to say, Happily Ever After, Bottom Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Top Stede Bonnet, Humor, Fluff Back in the day, this is where sex would end. With Ed, it's different. All things are, to be fair. Friendship, affection, romance, love, sex. Completely different from the way Stede has come to know those things. Where love used to be a task, this comes easy. Language: English Words: 2,355 Chapters: 1/1 Hits: 0

who guessed it. the banterers are bantering 😔 and fucking nasty 😛 enjoy!!!!

archiveofourown.org/works/80633721

Again 🫦

#ofmd #ofmdfanart #gentlebeard #ourflagmeansdeath

'my grandma keeps calling these shirts bisexual and i'm tryna tell her the word is fuckin unisex" @overheardatagaybar Jim wrestling with generational trauma.

life is pain. chin up sluts.

yes yes yes imgimme

can i toss a buck to hear whats redacted

Ed’s belly rolls when he gets folded in half!!! Also his complaints the next day about how he is getting too old to get fucked like that. Then his belly rolls again when he’s in the same position that night!!!!

Let’s do this!! For every $3 US you donate to Trans Continental Pipeline or a similar nonprofit supporting trans folks, you’ll get one entry in a drawing for one of my postcards. You can choose any of the images below. I’ll pull 3 names on March 8.

To enter: forms.gle/EdoVn9m1JdR3...

picked the RIGHT fucking day fto check bsky again god BLESS

E it's so easy to want you by 27 Feb 2026 ingydar Our Flag Means Death (TV) No Archive Warnings Apply, Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Stede Bonnet, Gender Themes, Feminization, but not really? because ed is vaguely nonbinary, Nonbinary Blackbeard | Edward Teach, Rimming, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Spit As Lube, Drunk Sex, ed teach pioneers the age old question "would you still love me if i was a worm?", worm boots, one single worm boot They're in bed early. The sun has only just set, but they had an early dinner, and they went for a swim, so they're both tired. Ed, especially, his eyes fluttering open and closed. He looks, bare against their sheets, like he's melting straight into them. They're a little drunk on wine, which is not at all a bad thing to be. Language: English Words: 3,302 Chapters: 1/1 Hits: 0

here i am w some dialogue that even made the writer horny. (even he was weirded tf out but for the perverts). i love you. i like this fic i like you so here it is. 🐬 🌈 🌟 🪱
archiveofourown.org/works/80361776

i mean what else am i gonna use to recover from the kind of stuff that happens in. well. like my most recent fic. yeah id say i could use some zero stakes porno

😭💖💖💖💖💖💖

you guys have fucking blown me away with this 😭😭😭😭 goal AND stretch goal met in less than a day and i feel so much more secure and at ease going into the surgery. thank you thank you THANK YOU to everyone who shared and donated 😭💖💖💖💖💖💖

thank you 😭💖💖

I LOVE YOU!!!!!

thank you 😭💖

this made me fully laugh out loud thank you 😂😭💖💖💖💖