Kelly

To me yes! They are the perfect amount of twizzler

SHUT YOUR DOOMER ASS UP & REGARD LIFE AS PRECIOUS ENOUGH TO DEFEND, SUNSHINE!!!!!

This season is important as it’s the only time twizzlers bunnies are available

The Singularity is upon us: Apple's AI summarized a text message that read "I'm still down to clown if you are" to.... "clown event still possible."

Can’t believe I missed the gianmarco/birbiglia beef

Louisville auctions off famous memorabilia

damn Louisville is really going through it

this is great, tell everyone I’m watching

Weevils Be Crawlin

If Amazon disappeared tomorrow I would gladly donate my retirement

I just moved my old 401k to an IRA and when I was talking to my finance guy he was all “we don’t have to worry it’s not like Amazon will disappear TOMORROW” and in my head I was like haha…unless…..

I blissfully thought Ben Shapiro and Charlie Kirk were the same person for YEARS, and it didn’t matter! I didn’t know what either of those fucks were saying!

I dream of a day where all the dumbest people in the world have nothing to do with mine or anyone else’s life anymore

please don’t

❤️❤️

Merlin bird app

It’s a fuckin party out here tonight babeyyy

I don’t like when contests are won by the amount of crowd cheering, you’re making me have to feel sad for people for not getting cheers and that’s unfair to me as an audience member

Like does she know what kind of cunt id be if I didn’t call my vegetables by their normal human names

They’re reenacting Jaws

😭😭😭😭

Here are my disgraceful, awful pizza bagels

If I had a nickel for every time Franz Ferdinand was involved in the precursor events of a world war, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird it happened twice

oh no

horrible use, a horse could have eaten it instead

yeah I’ve never been a fan either, also seems like something more suitable in a smaller pepper as a side

person at the grocery begged me for it, said they were gonna use it in a more noble and sophisticated way and I LAUGHED and SNEERED

I used some of it in an omelette this morning too, just to RUIN EVERYONE’S DAY

love this shit, like bitch what? Find your own giant bell pepper

Fuck off 🤷‍♀️

I don’t like how many ads for lunchables I’m getting lately, what’s about to happen to me

not yet! but I am boxed up and ready, just gotta get that firm job offer first, fun times