Jake Boss

Difficult people: “I’m easy. Just make me a dvd.”

You want me to author you a dvd in 2026.

Suddenly cats are willing to play ball with daylight savings time when it benefits them.

When they do the thing where the last line of dialogue aligns with the loop perfectly, I like it. I like it when they try.

As a huge TMNT fan, I tried to approach Wizards of the Coast with a potential reveal for the set. I worked really hard on it, but was swiftly denied and implored not to post my creation.

People are so afraid of Al. Guys, there’s nothing to be scared of. He’s just the guy in the chicken costume from Toy Story 2. Gimme a break!

I think that the real puppet master behind surveillance and intelligence is the only one who stands to gain anything from knowing what the fuck I’m getting up to. Santa.

I’m putting together a team.

a young boy with zombie makeup on his face is talking to a woman in a crowd . ALT: a young boy with zombie makeup on his face is talking to a woman in a crowd .

These ninja turtle alt art cards are so cute. I know people want to hate but...

He was played by DJ Khaled

He’s not a creature when adults are around and requests to be kept a secret.

If Barney the Dinosaur was a card, what would he do?

These need a lot of work still, but it's a neat thing I've been working on for a while.

Cookin

Okay, so what I’m finding is that Australia is actually just a place that is really far south. That’s what they mean.

I didn’t get him anything for Presidents’ Day.

My jokes don’t belong to the large army, man.

Is everyone gonna be mean if I treat this like a removal spell?

I have been made aware of some potential nuance in my statement above.

I’m done being pissed off. From now on, I’m gonna do the opposite. I’m gonna be pissed on.

Duolingo doesn’t understand the Pandora’s box it just opened.

Oh so nobody wants to draft alchemy lorwyn.

I have the Mickey. I should save you some money and not say this, but there’s a DVD player.

You should go see Send Help. It’s a really fun movie and it’s way better with a crowd.

Something about a shared facebook profile says he's on his last warning.

I have a theory that the Cha Cha Slide is probably the best possible alarm clock. Will report back with my findings. Thanks!

If drawing a card is worth one card, what's tutoring up a basic worth?

The patriots really need a board wipe.

Something about Lorwyn is all the little freaks

Pogo song of Jeff Probst

I’m so sick of having a rule 34 conversation before every game.