Maya

a man in a red jacket with the words do you wanna die written below him ALT: a man in a red jacket with the words do you wanna die written below him

I just got my first “SO IS IT TWINS HARDY HAR HAR HAR”

This is such a good idea stealing this for next year.

Custom made double breasted uniform great coat not alluding to any historical period in particular surely

Nine months later, that body of water down south is still the “Gulf of Mexico” to news outlets Since the start of summer, "Gulf of America" has been losing what little popularity it had in newsrooms.

New by me —>

Remember "Gulf of America"? Nine months later, news outlets have stuck to that other name everyone calls it

www.niemanlab.org/2025/10/nine...

OB: It’s not a bad idea for you to start pelvic floor PT. Here’s a referral and here’s a giant list of all the pelvic floor PT practitioners.

Me: Surely ONE of these will be 1) close to me, 2) accept new patients, 3) accept insurance.

Universe: lol bitch lower your standards.

I for one think the Epstein Ballroom will be magnificent. I love the decor theme of “what if Uday Hussein ran a Ramada Inn.” And giving it a theme song everyone will associate with it is a stroke of brilliance! “Thank Heaven for Little Girls” is very catchy.

Why does everyone keep calling it “The Epstein Ballroom?” Please stop repeating “The Epstein Ballroom” because it is not called “The Epstein Ballroom!” Don’t tell the news that it’s called “The Epstein Ballroom” and please don’t repost this!!!!!

A very small kitten, tabby and white, shouting while I hold her up in the air with one hand. If you look closely you can see that both she, and my hand, are covered in dirt. The plant in question is blurry in the background.

Tiny criminal, photographed this morning.

She jumped in the plant and promptly got digging zoomies.

Millionaire Tax That Inspired Mamdani Fuels $5.7 Billion Haul in Massachusetts A millionaire levy in Massachusetts that New York City mayoral frontrunner Zohran Mamdani holds up as a model for taxing the rich has generated $3 billion more in revenue than expected without forcing...

WELL HOW ABOUT THAT

"A millionaire levy in Massachusetts has generated $3 billion more in revenue than expected without forcing significant high-profile departures from the state."

www.bloomberg.com/news/article...

Wait how does one get on the Whale beat I want that

I should be able to charge chocolate covered almonds to my FSA, dammit.

RFK Jr. explains why socializing with Jeffrey Epstein wasn't such a big deal for him: ...l ran into everybody in NY. I mean, I knew Harvey Weinstein, I knew Roger Ailes, I knew -- O.J. Simpson came to my house. Bill Cosby came to my house."

“All my friends murdered and raped, sometimes they hung out at my house. Get over yourself.”

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I would laugh if this wasn't so true 😭

the Muppets have been real quiet since the Louvre heist

oh you’re a nihilist? name zero things that matter

Yesterday felt like Friday. Today feels like an indignity.

This week was an unnecessary nightmare why was literally every road operating on one lane.

So the moral of the story is don’t (do) send the 7.5 month pregnant person into the bakery if you don’t (do) want to be drowning in pastries.

I’m so happy Chuck Tingle is on the right side of history

Sometimes a bitch needs to buy herself two pastries on the way into work because traffic was extra absurd and she got cut off twice, once by a so-and-so doing her makeup while driving.

Rosie want boop.
Give Rosie boop.

Being in your 30’s is sneezing and hurting your neck.

Janet saying: Fun fact: Columbus is in the Bad Place because of all the raping, slave trade, and genocide.

Shall we hot drink together sometime soon?

patrick star from spongebob is pouring a cup of tea ALT: patrick star from spongebob is pouring a cup of tea

Hallelujah it’s finally hot tea season

I regret to inform you apparently she and Kate McKinnon dated

Two hours of work means I’ve earned a mid-morning nap night night 😴

North Koreans ordered to check women for 'bourgeois' breast implants Authorities in the city of Sariwon have been ordered to conduct physical examinations of women suspected to have undergone breast augmentation surgery.

A “capitalist, bourgeois” breast implant implies the existence of a “socialist, proletariat” breast implant.

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article...