Lindsey Graham's OK with our Strait of Hormuz strategy, except the "strait" part.
12.03.2026 06:47
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Lindsey Graham's OK with our Strait of Hormuz strategy, except the "strait" part.
I don't miss Charlie Kirk
Not by a long shot.
Guys, I'm not going to sugarcoat this.
Because it's already topped with chocolate frosting.
something-something Golf War
Trump's golfed so much since invading Iran, they should call it World War Fore.
OK, I'm ready to run the LA Marathon!
Where the hell is everyone?!
How long is Pete Hegseth sober every day?
Iran selected its new supreme leader without Trump's approval, in case you're wondering why there's a sudden shortage of ketchup bottles.
LA Marathon is French for "the marathon."
Trump thanked the Iranian president for apologizing to Gulf states, until he realized he didn't say "Golf" states.
Maybe invading Iran was a bad idea.
My fave scene from Hoppers...
Red Hot Chili Peppers have a new documentary on Netflix.
It's $7.99 to stream on March 20th... but they should give it away, give it away, give it away NOW.
Red Hot Chili Peppers have a new documentary on Netflix.
It's $7.99 to stream on March 20th... but they should give it away, give it away, give it away now.
Stop comparing Trump to Hitler!
Hitler didn't replace his dipshit Secretary of Homeland Security from South Dakota with another dipshit Secretary of Homeland Security from Oklahoma.
#KristiNoem
More like Kristi Noem More Job.
RFK Jr. questioned the safety of Dunkin' and Starbucks' iced coffee, but they're probably healthier than banning the measles vaccine.
It's called California Burrito because it's always 72 degrees and the traffic fucking sucks.
"Cornyn" sounds like something he does to his cousin. ##TXprimary
When the title itself is a joke, the movie is always shit...
Cops & Robbersons
Beautician and the Beast
Once Upon a Crime
Melania
Impeach.
Convict.
Hide cholesterol meds.
I donated to both campaigns, so...
Can Talarico pick Crockett for Vice Senator?
#TXprimary
Helluva job, both.
Now let's take that fucking Senate seat. #TXprimary
Thanks to Greg Abbott, voting is wheelie fucked. TXprimary
I've received 30 Grubhub texts in an hour.
They must really like me! 🥰
If anyone's gonna host the White House Correspondents' Dinner, it should be Charlie Kirk.
You know, Hitler had a neck rash right before committing suicide...
Pete Hegseth's all "I love Tehran! Tehran through this bottle of Jack."
Pete Hegseth says war with Iran won't be "endless."
He added, "My whiskey bottle, on the other hand..."
My favorite scene from Scream 8:
"He wasn't buried. We had him Scream8ted."