Rd8
26.02.2026 01:34
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Rd8
#alysaliu
WOKE IS BACK BABY
MAKE OAKLAND CALIFORNIA THE US CAPITOL NOW!
100 years of humiliation for Patriots “fans”
1000 years of humiliation for 49ers fans
10000 years of humiliation for Robert Kraft. Inshallah he reunites with Jeff tonight.
2031: at the Sysco Supermarket sponsored by DraftKings, three ICE agents give me an ocular patdown clearing me of anti-Kirk thought. Inside the store a woman with Mar-a-lago face hands me a jug of beef tallow. I tip her 2% of my Kalshi winnings. “Bill Maher is sure to be assassinated today” I think.
No fucking way bro
Some recent cat photos
MAMDANI: And I just think that there are barriers, barricades, to helping Americans that we can break down
TRUMP: Uh huh
MAMDANI: And breaking down barriers? Reminds me of a certain Broadway show *smiling widely* where they worked together to break a barricade?
TRUMP: *sitting bolt upright* Phantom
NYT Monday: Women ruined the workplace. (real op-ed)
NYT Tuesday: This is why Hitler McKillthemall is the future of the Democratic party.
NYT Wednesday: everyone in power is a pedophile and it was covered up. even WE covered it up. it’s horrible and we let it happen. may god have mercy on us all.
Oh, so it’s BAD bad
How is a triangle not a musical instrument? Paper of record, my ass. @nytimes.com
New York Times front page: Trump admin allegedly deports 10,000,000 Mexicans
New York Times opinions: We just gave $100,000,000 to Israel so they can kill Palestinians. Here’s why that’s a good thing.
New York Times puzzles: Volleyball is not an Olympic Sport you fool, You fucking buffoon
The failing New York Times has still not answered for this atrocity.
She Dune the worm on my Squid, I’m game
She calls me Luigi the way I’m blasting at my opps
Hello, I’ve come from the future. The Chiefs will beat the Bills 17-16 on a game winning field goal in the AFC championship game. They will then face the Vikings in the Super Bowl who will proceed to miss 4 field goals as the Chiefs win 10-7 and win their third straight.
a few months ago i got recognized by a group in a bar and ended up chatting with them for awhile and met their friend who has cancer and struggling with the system
for anyone confused why people feel catharsis or happy about what happened to the united CEO today, learn👇
I call her Hamburger Helper the way she’s stroganoff my beef
Breakfast of Champions
I know they’re 5 days apart, but why not do #Sonferatu
TGIF from Oliver!
TGIF from Oliver!
I am a rock
If you gave me $20 and a pack of grape swishers I could convince Eric Adams that Caesar Catalina is a real person and to invest in Megalon
In this world, you can either have your plans foiled, or your pants soiled
I call her Nixon the way my Richard makes her gates water
Doing a land acknowledgement before busting the fattest nut in the backseat of my 2013 Toyota Corolla
Gasoline is good for you because its dead dinosaur bone broth
Watch Oppenheimer? Nah dawg I need some Sloppenheimer
The fake nutritionists on TikTok need to stop their fixation on carnivore diets and seed oils and start focusing on an actual important health trend: colloidal silver
I’ve been offline all day so I have idea what’s happening with Twitter but check out my sandwich
