JC

When's Kendall Jenner heading over to give Isreal and Palestine a Pepsi?

Great list. I love my stegasaurus.

Googling haha

*puffs cigar*
Yes. Indeed my good man.

Being an adult means people stop caring what your favorite dinosaur is.

Mind your P* and Q**s.

*Penises
**Queefs

you can get through most of life on just “hell yeah brother” and “oof”

My favorite sound of autumn is probably the worms splupling on the sidewalk

No matter what I do, I know that I will never be as interesting as an owl.

Kinda weird how I'm the best thing ever to happen to Bluesky

Guard: Are there any reasons why we shouldn't let you into our heavily fortified post-apocalpytic fortress?

Me (recently zombie-bitten, possessed by a demon, has a chestburster behind my sternum and a nascent ebola infection): Not that I know of.

Yes. Blue Dave and Red Dave especially were living it up!

😂

Good to know. Smart 👍🏾

Ikr

Sorry I'm late, I was seeing juxtaposed multiple realities while being plagued by inexplicable compulsions and phantom sensations again.

I'll keep ya posted.
*sees suspicious drone above*

I put my shirt on before my pants this morning to throw off the Illuminati.

Gas, grass, or rage? Lol

🤣😂🤣

Oppenheimer? Dat you? Lol

Anyone else here fueled entirely by rage, or y'all switched to electric yet?

I don't battle my inner demons anymore. We've teamed up instead.

God doesn't care if you drink or swear

Mostly because he is pretend

the sexual tension between me and this tube of chap stick tho