The Door Guy

Make sure they go through the machine in size order so you can watch their eyes widen

They're free for personal use but contact us for enterprise pricing

Fastest static build in the west

*hugs*

Lowpoly ass you say...

Sounds like a plan

Maybe that's its fetish

Oh wow yes please >///<

Trans union score sounds pretty based

Oh god am I going to have to figure out how that matrix thing works

Watching a hypno video and the onscreen text says "you can archive orgasm".

I have pretty low standards but I draw the line at proofreading.

Your voice is very comforting and you always bring great vibes. Plus you're just a lot of fun to chat with!

Hey I was teaching those

Durex condom in an orange box labeled "OBLIVION". Along the bottom it says "Don't Look Down".

Alton Towers made promotional condoms for their Oblivion roller coaster.

*offers hug*

At my apartment they use a third-party company to do pet paperwork, and you have to sign up even if it's just to click "I don't have any pets". During that process they show you several ads, and then try to trick you into consenting to being emailed more ads. I hate this type of company.

"No clutter" except this bizarre onboarding screen that seems to be trying to advertise the concept of looking at files.

Guys will see this and just think "hell yeah"

Don't ask a question that you don't want to know the answer to

I guess this is basic but I'm a big fan of "deep", like "deeply controlled".

From my understanding being bald gives +30% to hypno ability

Dressed up formal for a wedding or something, but not enjoying it.

I'm a SaaS, $10/month billed annually

And Defkly is a very good puppy!

Declarative languages sound like such a good idea but so often I end up needing to trick the computer into doing the specific sequence of steps I actually want.

My favorite thing is when someone is really zonked and the tist picks up their limp arm and drops it again. So good.

Well I know what I'm hoping will happen

You can help your hypnosub with their self esteem by giving them mantras like "I'm hot when I'm hypnotized", "People love looking at my brainwashed body" and "I'm a pretty dolly, to be groped and ogled"

If your solution to "Windows no longer getting security updates" is "pipe some random website directly into powershell because a stranger on bsky told you to" I think the security patches are kind of a lost cause anyway.

Go for it