lottie "CyberBarabbas" lovely ⚧️🏴‍☠️

everybody got the one homie who a straight up JRPG villain

wishing every

ᴀɢɢʀᴇꜱꜱɪᴠᴇʟʏ
ᴀꜱꜱᴇʀᴛɪᴠᴇ ᴍᴀɴ
ᴡʜᴏ ꜰᴏʀᴄɪʙʟʏ
ᴛᴀᴋᴇꜱ ᴀ ᴘᴏꜱɪᴛɪᴏɴ
ᴏꜰ ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀɪᴛʏ
ᴏᴠᴇʀ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴏɴᴇ
ᴀʀᴏᴜɴᴅ ʜɪᴍ

a very

ɢᴇᴛ ʜɪᴛ ʙʏ
ᴀ ʙᴜꜱ

CEOs listed in Epstein Files have strong moral opinions against Ageplay

silence, wastrel. To the sluggo manifolds with ye

every crew has that 1 homeboy who makes histrionic mental flights to the black crystal world using learned helplessness based astral projection but his plans to "remove the vitality out of this evil world for the mother void to claim it" and "Return dominion to the sleepers" end when he gets a treat

i'm gonna be real i am content with my place and time in the universe but if i could Somewhere In Time autohypnotize myself to hook up with the mustelid max headroom in the year of my own birth i fucking would

sorry, 1987. myths and legends abound of the pussy

you know the person whose 1989 boysona was some kind of mustelid max headroom has absolutely crazy pussy in 2026

this is also my ongoing frustration. you can not run for office on "democracy is under threat" and then lose and go "oh well, nice game everyone"

they put us in a constant state of hypervigilance & terror begging for our last $5 to save the country and then they do the joint softball game.

its too late ive depicted you as the soy dumbshit bug eyed pokey and myself as the chad confident and all knowing prickle

No

russia had a vibrant, active LGBTQ community 20 years ago, with publications, bars, neighborhoods. now it is silent and underground, all public expression deemed "pornographic" and "illegal", even a rainbow flag. that is what the richest and most powerful men in the world are bringing worldwide.

taking a shit is normal. You often take a shit on the toilet. You only start crapping if something's going terribly wrong, maybe long ago, and maybe you just sort of made peace with it

remember: crap is always worse than shit

trump term 1 could walk back from the abyss when his big stupid mouth and endless yearning for undivided attention from the whole world threatened to test his total, overwhelming cowardice. But he's too cooked at this point

i will freely admit i never believed he'd actually start a war. But I failed to account for how very fucking stupid the man is, and how very fucking lazy

fuck the system

five nine, five ten? i'm a bad judge of height tbh

also there's this classic

we actually keep trying to convince crows to work for us by making little machines they can drop trash in in exchange for treats. but the crows reliably figure out some way to cheat the machine and prefer to do that so it never works out. i love that for them

6 Go-To Phrases for Disengaging from Barn Gossip "I'm trying to stay out of barn drama" "I'm not the best person to ask about that" "I don't really want to talk about someone who isn't here" "I try to assume good intentions" "Anyway, how did your ride go?" Equestrian Mental Wellness "I hope they work it out"

really important PSA

CHARLES SCHULZ: i know my new comic about a romantically successful little boy is good, but no editor wants it
HIS FRIEND: huh. newspapers will just print anything. "dewey defeats truman". no he didn't. that's not true
CHARLES SCHULZ: *eyes roll back, hand draws Joe Cool under its own power*

honestly yeah

How do you invent a sword?

#ヤギ

if altered beast was made today people would not like it because they would want it to have pronouns

on twitter you post tweets, on bluesky u post bleats. baa

You can't say that about coins

lie as hard as you can to marketing surveys. tell them you love belts more than christ. tell them you want to only hear about domino's and nothing else. tell them you've never heard of windex