Wilder Newyear

Report: eBay Asks GameStop if TCGPlayer Can Be Exchanged for Store Credit | Commander's Herald GRAPEVINE, TX — Over the past few weeks, chatter has grown around a potential buyout of eBay by GameStop.  However, thanks to some internal leaks and small bribes to underpaid interns, the Commander’s...

“What they’re hoping to do is have a less fortunate venture capitalist with more limited finances take the company. Give the little guy a chance to toy with the careers of a few hundred live humans."

Report: eBay Asks GameStop if TCGPlayer Can Be Exchanged for Store Credit | Commander's Herald GRAPEVINE, TX — Over the past few weeks, chatter has grown around a potential buyout of eBay by GameStop.  However, thanks to some internal leaks and small bribes to underpaid interns, the Commander’s...

My headline brought to life and by the very funny and talented @wildernewyear.bsky.social, who you should go follow if you don't already! These writers are so good, yo.

commandersherald.com/report-ebay-...

We Are The Union - Self Care

Oh no, I'm not putting my cards anywhere near that. I have enough trouble with choking with my decks as-is.

It was 2019. We all had Enzo memory holed during that time, lest we were to summon that Simon Gotch video back to the YouTube Algorithm.

Riftbound Player Who Went 0-3 at Locals Confused That He Has No Teammates to Blame | Commander's Herald Lake City, Florida — Silver rank, Master Yi-main Billy Helminster was baffled last night as he came in dead last at his local Riftbound local championship without any teammates to drag him down. “It w...

“It’s the damnedest thing when you have to do the support’s jobs yourself, and you lose anyway!”

A grainy image of Hungarian rapper Speak, wearing a dark brown coat and matching pants, sitting at the base of what appears to be a war memorial. The subtitles on the shot read "don't know what is for (business)".

Speak - Stop The War (lyrics/subtitles) YouTube video by knallpulver71

Since we're a generation removed from the last major illegal war in the middle east, might as well remind the kiddos of this amazingly memeable anti-war song by Hungarian rapper Speak.

youtu.be/Eqk4pWnVN5w?...

So like early season Law and Order, but make it medical instead of legal?

A black cat (Newton) sits on my lap on the left side of the image, while I wear a worn black tank top on the right.

Newton doesn't care about Daylight Savings or how late I was up last night. The morning cuddles must go on!

Me, in a vest

See my vest?

Former Chicago Bull great Scottie Pippen.

Realizing that, with the Star Trek set coming later this year, I can finally make a Rule 0 Partner deck with my Commanders Scottie & Pippin.

If you like magic and laughing, check out this starter pack!
go.bsky.app/63XWAC5

reposts appreciated

Kansas Prison Magic Scene To Receive Influx of Mythic Grinders | Commander's Herald As of last Thursday, February 26th, the Kansas state legislature has made a move expected to, among other things, place a very significant amount of skilled Magic: The Gathering players in Kansas coun...

“Because we, like all lawmakers, have absolutely no interest or incentive to work for the benefits of our constituents, we’ve got a lot of free time. We decided to use that to, for some reason, get really invested in the Magic meta in our county jails!”

Chicago Style Cube. You're just taking an extra month to soak in the ambiance.

David Ellison Promises to Return Warner Bros. to Its Original 1923 Values | Commander's Herald HOLLYWOOD, CA – After a bidding war with Netflix, Paramount is poised to acquire legacy media giant Warner Bros. This would give the company a massive share of the entertainment industry, and many wor...

“We’re committed to respecting the legacy of Warner Bros. by upholding the values that created the legendary company. We at Paramount firmly believe in protecting those century-old morals. The exact values that created classic movies like The Jazz Singer.“

Terrance Howard-ass Number Theory

Your regular reminder Ghost Rider Johnny Blaze is canonically from Waukegan, IL. All those monologues about being the Spirit of Vengeance and dragging people to hell should be done with the thickest Chicago-Midwestern accent applied. Thank you for your time.

Highway to Nowhere: Bad.

Practical movie set they let everyone drive through: Awesome.

Trans Magic Player With Empty Hand Thoughtseized Anyways | Commander's Herald It's not about helping anyone, it's about sending a message. Not sure who originally said that, but I'm pretty sure it was the good guy."

This historic move marks the first known time a Commander player’s complaint about being targeted is actually valid

I think it's also the Catholic guide to determining what can be eaten during Lent.
Turtles? Fish.
Beavers? Fish.
Corned Beef? Fish, but only if it's St. Patrick's Day in NYC.

This is where I would be posting a "Wilder Newyear will be attending Chicago Style Cube!" image with some wacky fonts and wingdings, but I'm not here for my photoshop skills.

Latest Hegseth Speech Clearly Flavor Text from Red Magic Cards | Commander's Herald WASHINGTON, D.C. – Spectators of a recent Pete Hegseth speech report that the high-ranking military official read his speech directly from the flavor text of Magic: The Gathering cards. The speech, pr...

"If your blood doesn’t run hot, I will make it run in the sands! Execution awaits the dissenter. Diplomacy has solved nothing. Only bloodspill can end this now. Call forth the warbringer!”

The unspoken Midwestern joy of answering a stranger's question of "what's that siren?" with "Oh, it's Tuesday."

Given his perceived vanity and affinity for his robotic dopplegangers, isn't "selfcest" Doom's ultimate goal?

Okay, but what happens when you add the Kurt Angle DLC to the mix?

Watto has said:
I hate Sebulba

Because he is Albanian

Fine, guess I've gotta jump through a few hoops to get my infinite turns off Time Vault.

I have it written on my apron.

The GOP is the party of "Marriage is the Root Cause of 100% of Divorces" bumper stickers.