Zeb Ulon

if he wasn't a teetotaler i'd assume it was a "pretty good proof" he was tossing back before heading out on stage.

based on his supernatural ear regeneration abilities i doubt it would still be there.

"It is unclear [...] how she knew it was Trump."

the guy with the very annoying super distinct voice who regularly refers to himself in the third person? yeah. big mystery.

he used the word regularly during the 2024 campaign. seems he should definitely still remember that.

it's weird they keep forgetting that. then again conservatives aren't so great on planning ahead so they probably immediately memoryhole it.

oh i don't think that $1K voucher was *monthly*. pretty sure it was annually.

is this speech *entirely* made up of clips that'll be perfect for upcoming Democratic campaign ads? pretty convenient!

basic math isn't open to interpretation?

wild he thinks 'the media' is crazy and unreasonable vs. him being dead wrong as any 4th grader could tell you.

not great that he thinks groups of people need to be "registered".

maybe just maybe a diverse group of people haven't ever wanted to have anything to do with plainly dumb bigots like Andy Ogles in his entire life. that seems way more likely.

he has never had to "go shopping" in his life. short of shopping for victims.

my reels feed is a whole bunch of Al videos of dachshunds doing human tasks (frequently in occupation appropriate outfits) and then another dachshund will show up and they just go apeshit and start battling each other. as i type it out i am realizing just how insane that sounds.

friend mentioned how AI video has made his Facebook Reels feed increasingly horrific so i was telling him what mine was like and. wait. what. what is even going on.

ad from Facebook Marketplace saying '1991 Nissan regular cab long bed - $4,000" then a real dumb AI helper bubble underneath seeing if i need to know "why is this car in the photo?". yeah. definitely need to drain 7 freshwater lakes to have an AI lie to me about why a photo of the vehicle might be included in a 'for sale' ad for that very same vehicle. such an unsolvable mystery.

i don't think we need electric rates spiking nationwide to have some dipshit AI solve this mystery for me? 😂

(i managed to figure it out on my own just fine. 🕵🔬🧐📊👨🏻‍🔬)

Audi TT parking in front of a shed and completely buried in snow.

though not this winter. record snow has buried it quite a bit. only that sliver of tail light visible.

really hope i won't have to use it as a backup car anytime soon. 😂

(parked next to equally buried STI-swapped Legacy GT that has some timing issue i need to fix.)

i use my first gen TT as a winter beater. also regularly acts as a 'trash truck' since the hatch + seats down can hold a surprising amount of construction detritus and trash bags.

i got this haldex plug/primer thing that makes the AWD a lot better in snow (and in general) then studded tires.

the laziest president ever doesn't have time? come on man. 😂

and rokos basilisk existing as a concept. not the actual dorkass thing itself but it existing at all. as then grimes did a pun about it and elon thought that was the most clever thing ever. etc etc. then elon became the most divorced dude ever and realizes if he buys twitter he can read grimes DMs.

they didn't have any good stories for kes and she wasn't quite sexy enough.

and lowtax banning hentai obviously.

someone needs to quote them verbatim and attribute them to Obama/Biden/whoever he is whining about at the time and see what his response is before reminding him that it was actually him that said it.

nice to see it is already thinning.

a lot of that is because he is a 19yo dressing like a mid-30s dude from an '80s comedy that is going to close the ski resort.

actual 6'9" or like his dads 6'3" 😉😉😉?

ah guess the glitter vomit is indeed real in-universe. goofy.

"This is infinity here. It could be infinity. We don’t really don’t know. But it could be. It has to be something, but it could be infinity, right?"

- Donald Trump (who had a 10yo at the time) responding to Buzz Aldrin saying the classic line from Toy Story.

gizmodo.com/buzz-aldrins...

so multiple people are using this very dumb line now? must've been on the handout. only the absolute smoothest of brains thinks this is a clever GOTCHA! that owns the libs.

because it is dumb and nonsense to anyone that spends more than 2 seconds thinking about it.

but it is such a super duper clever GOTCHA! that they imagine owns all the libs. so they'll definitely beat it into the ground no matter how plainly stupid it is.

what a fresh hot take that no one has ever heard before. that might be the most gotcha-iest gotcha that has ever existed. absolute genius. everyone is soooo soooo owned right now!

if he TRULY believes it is MUTILATION it seems kinda weird that he is fine with parents mutilating their children?

definitely seems like something someone credibly accused of serially raping and abusing children might say.

in the past Trump has suggested it is somehow a same-day procedure done without the parents knowledge. go to school one gender and come back another. plainly insane nonsense that the most gullible people on the planet accept as truth.