Many Types of Tea

Sorry but if you don’t want me listening in on your train conversation, be more boring??

Mainly I go for front row, second from the left when it’s available, but second row third from the left is great when that’s in the dishwasher

I particularly like the ones that have an undercurrent of “life is tough and then you die, why bother caring about anything”

a woman in a red shirt is making a funny face and saying `` sure , jan '' . Alt: a woman in a red shirt is making a funny face and saying `` sure , jan '' .

So you’re saying someone trapped a deer in a ravine for likes is it ?

There’s a particular type of rage in my heart that I keep for comments like this (on a sweet story about a deer getting out of a ravine because volunteers built steps for him, & how he reunited with his herd)

Is it a moisturiser, a toner or eye make up remover? MAYBE. Am I getting flashbacks to the calculations in Chemistry exams? DEFINITELY

Skincare was very simple when I was a teenager. There was eye make up remover (blue), toner (see through) and moisturise (white). Now everyone wants me to pay £35 for 5% Squaimic Acid

*saying affirmations in the mirror* I am a big horse. I am a beautiful horse with powerful legs. I am fifteen hands tall. No one can catch me because of my powerful horse legs and wild nature. I have all the apples I want

I’m trying to find some office space in Glasgow and literally everyone I’m talking to has the same name as me

I thought in some cases it was the same person but no. Louises love to organise space

(Also if you have cheap office space in Glasgow hmu)

10 out of 10, no notes

I just vomited into my mouth imagining this

You know the rules and I know the rules and I adhere to the rules (watch it all the way through any time it crosses your feed)

Honestly you get to the mid 40s point of your teenage years and nobody takes anything on trust any more

“I could be a teenager!” I scream. “I have the rizz!”

Did not appreciate the tone with which the waitress at the pizza restaurant looked at my student ID tonight. I didn’t appreciate that at all

What a distinguished gentleman

You just can’t get mad at February. It’s barely here and it’s gone. It’s just a little guy

High points of the night: got a free pizza & glass of wine cos my friend saw a mouse running down the stairs of the restaurant
Low point of the night: half an hour trying to get the front door key to my friend’s flat to work (at half past midnight)

What age is the cut off for Blind Date references? I’m getting blank looks for my “same question, contestant number 2”s lately

I would actively like you to remove copilot

Oh he’s so SERIOUS and MANLY

I absolutely think of it weekly

"The men implicated in the Epstein files reinforces that I spend half my life explaining to men that their simplified, optimistic view of other men doesn’t line up with the experience of women and girls trying to dodge sexual harassment, assault and abuse attempts." - Leslie Morgan Steiner

Good soup

1984, truly a year in which musicians took turns in leaning on every button on their keyboard

a man with a beard is surrounded by mathematical equations on his face Alt: a man with a beard is surrounded by mathematical equations on his face

I checked the cupcakes I have in the oven and they would have needed two more minutes, but I opened the oven, so now they need four more minutes, but then I opened the oven again to check them so that four minutes became six minutes, but then

I know it’s not but I just feel like Reelin’ in the Years should be by Thin Lizzy

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