The Starr system

Hate that I can’t have a good relationship with my dad, seriously the man only texts on holidays or a birthday if he remembers.

Fucking annoying, but whatever.

Ellie made a decision today

Protective and professional mode are just Elliott, but protective is more dominant than anything and professional mode is just more confident at masking.

Also Ellie missed daddy and needed to relax and not be so tense, so she called Daddy.

It was pretty adorable honestly. She comes out the most with him. Otherwise she just makes comments in my head most the time. But I think we needed to do that, Elliott had a rough work day and Ellie needed comfort

We…we just named our “cleaning demon”

When that side comes out she is called Barbie.

I cannot believe that this is what we chose. But it makes Ellie giggle and Elliott smirk hearing “cleaning demon Barbie” in a sentence. Don’t know if she’s an alter or just a silly thing, but this is a thing

Nah I didn’t do it yet

…not sure if I should tell my therapist about us yet.

It scares me.

Makes me miss my daddy and being comfortable with him.

But I also feel bad about not telling him that we are more than just one.

Ugh, this is…frustrating

We’ve named our new alter Vex.

He’s one we like putting away unless needed. Vex is typically easily angered and comes out in spurts. But sometimes takes over with venom in his mouth to spit.

He’s just trying to protect us, but he scares me when he does come through at times. He’s a lot.

SAME

Update: I’ve learned my brain has different “modes” I’ve been categorizing and those are just…alters.

“Puppy mode” “Pro mode” and “protective mode” being the three.

Ellie is the first one. Don’t have names for the other two tho

Ellie needed a picture with him before he left.

She only really comes out when he’s with me, it’s gonna be kinda quiet without her here.

She’s his little girl and you can see how much he loves her and how she loves him.

Meanwhile with me, we’re just Da Bois together. Oh my god 🤣

Okay we talked it out, everyone is good.

Men is too headache some days

TELLING ME ABOUT IT IS JUST GONNA GIVE ME MORE ANXIETY

Guess today is “tell your partner with an anxiety disorder about something your brain is worried about, but don’t tell them anything because you don’t want to be right without more detail” day

Elliott’s back, Ellie was out all night but my babe took care of her so good, especially when he fucked up 🥺

We came back, I cuddled with my cat next to him and we fell asleep.

We’re figuring it out together, but being hypersexual can sometimes be hard for us.

It’s for a McDonalds drink run, he needs comfort right now and I do too, so he’s getting my fave

He’s taking us for a car ride. Let’s hope it’s okay

I hope you feel at ease bud.

He apologized to me about it, thankfully.

He had to use our safe word because it was making him more forceful to touch him back when I’d stop touching him. I was getting tired because of my tendinitis flaring.

He really is a good man, I didn’t expect him to feel he needed to own his selfishness.

Failed at getting my daddy off.

Thats never happened and I’m trying not to take it personally.

Fuck.

-Ellie

When you’re getting spoiled by external orgasms so much that internal ones aren’t as satisfying.

I’m happy we have them but it isn’t the same.

I also miss daddy, but he’s coming back in a couple days. Still wanna cry about it but I’m not actually gonna.

GREGG RULZ OK.
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