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Val Halla

@thevaleriehalla

"She doesn't glue down her lacefronts and she's never home." Henri Duparc evangelist.

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Latest posts by Val Halla @thevaleriehalla

And he has said it ON RECORD.

If you hired a person to teach 3rd grade math and they spent their day talking about Shakespearean literature, you’d fire that teacher and find a math teacher for eight year olds.

At the very least, primary your grifting representative. Come on.

11.03.2026 04:26 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

It is crazy how many people are okay with their representatives voting on bills based on their representative’s ideologies instead of the ones that are in best interest of the majority of their constituency. Like John Fetterman is just straight up not properly representing his district anymore-

11.03.2026 04:26 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Slutty gay men know EXACTLY what I’m talking about, don’t act brand new.

11.03.2026 04:01 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Darlene Mitchell has that smile that you can only get when you have a big swingin’ uncut dick

11.03.2026 04:00 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

On their lawns with torches and pitchforks NOWWWWWWWW

11.03.2026 03:42 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

As always, I have worked up the in-office time at work this week to be much more high pressure and high anxiety than it has ended up being. I’m still anxious (because I keep thinking that my colleagues are mad at me for things they’ve never said to me) but I’m having a nice time anyway.

11.03.2026 03:38 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
@CNN Pizza shop workers took down an armed robber -- but when police took off his mask, they discovered he was their old boss.

@CNN Pizza shop workers took down an armed robber -- but when police took off his mask, they discovered he was their old boss.

and he would have got away with it too if it wasn't for those meddling kids

11.03.2026 01:05 πŸ‘ 1732 πŸ” 310 πŸ’¬ 21 πŸ“Œ 14

Literally LMAO I can't remember the last time I was under 200.

10.03.2026 03:04 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

So is MTA just not accepting Apple Pay at all this week…?

10.03.2026 02:25 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

At this point I think our CS team at work is literally 50% queer and I really love that about my job. Helping queer people from the theater world understand tech is so rewarding.

10.03.2026 01:24 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Post image
09.03.2026 01:51 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I even hate the phrase β€œPickle juice” YOU ARE DRINKING A BRINE. YOU’RE DRINKING A CURING LIQUID.

09.03.2026 01:49 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Noticed that I left my wallet in my car approximately ten milliseconds after my train started leaving the station so I had to get off at the next stop, wait for the next train, take it BACK, get my wallet, and get on the next hour’s train. So now I’ll be getting into my hotel at 11:30 PM. 🫠

09.03.2026 01:04 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

That’s Orville Peck bby!

08.03.2026 22:11 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Before any of you come for me:

I thought he was an actor for some reason but never even bothered to look up anything about him lmao ANYWAY the Gen Z drag kings are probably eating his music up.

08.03.2026 21:32 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Didn’t even know Benson Boone was a singer but here I am listening to that little fruit shriek Mr. Electric Blue in my car.

08.03.2026 21:29 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 1

Full daylight at 5:30 PM. My brain is exploding.

08.03.2026 21:24 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

But to your point, aging is a privilege and getting old is a badge of honor that needs to be celebrated.

08.03.2026 19:13 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

And a personal hot take:

If you feel like you need to fight the uphill battle of visibly aging, the only affordable thing you can do that won’t give you a FNAF animatronic face is taking care of your skin starting in your twenties. Literally nothing else works or is sustainable.

08.03.2026 19:09 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Doctors who provide that sort of care aren’t often the ones whose work is put in the spotlight, which is really unfortunate.

And I promise I’m not trying to change your mind or preach! I don’t support that ideology either, and it’s really not something I want my nieces growing up with.

08.03.2026 19:09 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Transgender people are a good example of that, but I think there’s a good number of non-trans people who are in that sort of space because the person they know themselves to be doesn’t look like the person in the mirror.

08.03.2026 19:09 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

If it’s done well and administered responsibly, it usually won’t look like that person has β€œhad work done” or is looking for some kind of escape from who they are. A lot of people opt into it because it helps them look more like who they see themselves to be rather than looking like someone else.

08.03.2026 19:09 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

I agree that people getting procedures or injections to feel like they β€œlook pretty enough” or something is hard to watch, and marketing medicine like that is deeply wrong.

And also, most of that hyper-vain aesthetic people see is bad work being done by sellout doctors and vanity enablers.

08.03.2026 19:09 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Why yes, I COULD be packing everything else for my work trip while I wait for clothes to dry. ORRRRR I could watch YouTube and nap and then panic pack everything so my brain thinks I’m being chased through the woods.

08.03.2026 17:11 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

β€œSleek and Stylish” and it looks like someone made it in their garage.

08.03.2026 14:44 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

It’s very weird to me that hospitals have CEOs. That’s weird, right?

08.03.2026 14:41 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Hell of a night to not be able to fall asleep until 4:00 AM that turned into 5:00 AM. 🫠

08.03.2026 14:27 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

It’s as if video game composers all suddenly learned about cellos in the last five years.

08.03.2026 01:45 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Iman is seventy and has skin better than I do and I’m younger than half her age

07.03.2026 23:44 πŸ‘ 0 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I bought three baskets for my bathroom and one wooden serving platter that I’m using as a tray in my kitchen and when I tell you this place feels ten times better with some of my stuff corralled into baskets and trays.

07.03.2026 23:28 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0