i thought i was writing about an old friend, but i realized along the way that it was just about me outgrowing past versions of myself
06.03.2026 07:00
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i thought i was writing about an old friend, but i realized along the way that it was just about me outgrowing past versions of myself
@necaautnecare.bsky.social
being an introvert is less about you being more quiet than the world and more about your head being so loud that you need the world to be quiet
I wanted to find out who I am, what I had lost – and yet the more I find out, the more confusing and horrible it all gets. Why did I have to be curious?! But why am I afraid of my past? Probably ‘cause my past is rotten. And I deserve the vengeance of demons.
am i perfect yet?
I’m sorry my flesh is softer than it has to be, my skin thinner than yours. I’m sorry there are parts of me I have scrubbed raw, hurt; I only wanted to be polished, untainted, good as new.
"I found you" #chiscara
@necaautnecare.bsky.social
i sat with my anger long enough until she told me her real name was grief
☆ : Seconding the maraca comment, I'm going to eat him and you
when did i start to lose the parts of me that weren't just anger?
i am angry. i am unlovable.
i am mostly scared these things are true.
i still remember. do you?
He did not offer him purpose as a gift 、but as a weapon. Cold and sharp 、forged from his emptiness. Turning his every breath into a silent strike against a world that had long forgotten him.
@necaautnecare.bsky.social
God, the touch sent a shiver down his spine. It almost made him flinch. When was the last time he felt a touch so soft? A touch so comforting? One that didn't desire to cause him pain but one that was soft and caring?
Life must go on even for those who don't wish it. Surrendering himself to the vicissitudes of fate, he grasps the hand of someone he had once abandoned, unaware that this will lead to his own redemption.
☆ : I see Gjohn....
MORE OFTEN THAN NOT，THE DOG THAT BITES IS THE DOG THAT THINKS HE HAS NO OTHER OPTION; I FEEL AS THOUGH MY BODY LANGUAGE MUST BE CONSTANTLY SCREAMING IF YOU DO NOT KEEP YOUR FINGERS OUT OF THE BARS YOU ARE GOING TO GET THEM TORN OFF.
There is nothing else in this world like realizing you’re going to live and not being sure you can.
".... It's too quiet. Someone's gonna ruin that."
@necaautnecare.bsky.social
something about how Scara doesn't actually need to breathe :')
#chiscara
You have been wronged, tore up since birth. You have done harm. Others have done worse.
i'm not a good person. ask anyone who knows me. i'm mean and bitter and a failure at everything that i say. i believe i'm not a good person.
i miss you so much it feels fucking gross. it feels wet. it feels nauseating. i want to rip out my heart and shake it like a magic 8 ball. is this okay, is this okay, is this okay? or does it make me weak?