Daisy Maelstrom

The cutie sitting next to me at the bar just noticed I was looking at dinosaur memes on my phone. I am overstimulated.

Lmao!

I'm taking another conflict resolution class. I'm going to weaponize this to win so many arguments in the future, y'all don't even know

Most of my friends are BIPOC women these days. I have never felt a greater sense of community.

I'm at the opening showcase for the 10th annual PNW Black Comedy Festival. Three of my friends from the hometown are on stage tonight. It's been a great show!

I'm anti-war, but I still think any country that refuses to take care of their veterans is automatically a shitty country. If you can't afford to take care of them for the rest of their lives, you can't afford wars.

Fall in love? You mean grossly adjusting my amigdala to feel anxious when they aren't near and screwing with my already busted dopamine levels?

Sure, sounds fun.

All Scorpios are into feet 👎

*flirting* what the fuck is wrong with you?

I'm sorry it's Valentines Day to everyone who feels trapped in an abusive relationship. 98% of you are preparing to have a terrible day, and I see you trying to do the best you can to get through it

Am I depressed, or have I just been trapped inside a corrupt and failing empire run by pedophiles and speed running our entire species towards climate change extinction?

It's not fatphobic to recognize/mourn how differently people treat you when you're fat.

I'm a huge fan of the genre of insults towards men that are just descriptions of what happens to most men as they age.

Receding hairline? Dick don't work? LAUGH AT THIS MAN FOR HAVING A NORMAL BODY REACTING TO THE PASSING OF TIME!

You're allowed to choose partners/friends based upon their mental and physical health, but then you never get to complain when people are prejudiced against you for the same reasons during the rest of your life.

ACAB includes your ring camera.

Carrying my lightsaber on the bus downtown towards the fire ceremony for the opening night of the festival of lights in Portland has me feeling all sorts of ways.

It's f*cked that we live in the timeline where every end-of-the-world scenario are manifesting in the real world simultaneously.

What do you mean we get climate change, Skynet, Cyberpunk, and fascism during the same generation? This is some real nonsense.

A random guy on the sidewalk just gave me a thumbs up after watching me parallel park on the first try so now my depression is cured for at least two hours

Maybe it's the shock comic in me, but I think suicide is funny when ICE agents do it.

You're right, you ARE undeserving of love and forgiveness 😆

Can't believe I have to say this but climate change is responsible for extreme cold snaps.

It seems like every other month on social media brings new discourse where people shame women for something that I thought most of us found nearly irresistible.

Do straight men even like women?

How many people does ICE have to hurt before it's community self-defense to erase them from the server on sight?

If the government ever murders me, please remind everyone that the only gang I belong to is the one that bangs your mom

If you're not sleeping with me, you are sleeping against me.

I don't think we're mad enough about all the Black men who keep getting lynched and then having it recorded as a self-termination.

We are a rogue state, run by a dictator, and the international community should treat us as such including all appropriate economic and diplomatic sanctions

This is not complicated. The United States does not have the authority, moral or otherwise, to police and invade other countries. Full stop.

I have long ago lost track of the number of war crimes I have personally witnessed our presidents commit in my lifetime, but this one still managed to genuinely shock me.

We invaded a foreign country, specifically for the profit of Exon, murdering civilians, and kidnapping their leader and spouse.

My annual resolution is to not make resolutions.

That way I can fail immediately and not have to think about it again until next year.