Ilyasaurus 🐝

WE’LL BE LESS ACTIVIST IF YOU BE LESS SHIT

I'm a prison abolitionist but I do think every city should have one small prison which is just for people who don't use headphones on public transportation

two inlaid brooches shaped like birds

spring/summer hot fashion tip: i heard that zoomorphic fibulae are expected to make a BIG comeback!

Walt Simonson's title card for the ALIEN comics adaptation

Thinking about Walt Simonson's title card for the ALIEN comics adaptation

‘This guy is going to destroy civilization as we know it, and the earth, and all because of these people who don't have any idea why they're alive.’
- Michael Shannon in 2016 predicting the hell we’re in now
www.rogerebert.com/interviews/y...

That sucks so bad. I’m so sorry ❤️ Internet hugs from a stranger to both you and Lilith, who is good people.

Update: we have an emergency hearing for tomorrow and I got to be mentioned in a pleading for the first time ever! :D

i would go to clubs if this was the dance floor this was the dj this was the music and this was the drink featuring medieval art

Our Lady of Paralegals, Erin Brockovich, probably never had to deal with this bullshit.

He said no. (???????????)

He then LITERALLY FLED OUR FUCKING OFFICE. (????????????????????)

So now head honcho lawyer is on the phone with the POLICE. (?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????)

My ten years of legal experience has not prepared me for my office being fucking BURGLED.

An attorney (confirmed) came in to pick up settlement checks. He was handed the folder CONTINGENT on him calling our head honcho lawyer.

He refused to call the lawyer. (???)

We asked for the checks back… 1/2

an exhausted orange cat, on a pillow, yawning widely

Give me my fucking hour back. I need it

Snorlax

the cast of Star Trek Voyager in street clothes awkwardly posing with late-90s computer hardware and consumer electronics

this is what it feels like to post on bluesky

@ruh-rho.gay I think you need this for the nursery

GOD how selfish of him

Star Trek Voyager scene. We're in an old stoney brickey small church environment and the EMH Doctor seems to be back on his bullshit. He's wearing priestly clothing, all black, and pointing with rage and fury, his face all tense and snarled and he's gritting his (holographic) teeth. Closed caption reads, "Sinners, all of you." TBH it feels like an exclamation point would fit better here but closed captions sometimes miss the intensity. So please, dear reader, you have my encouragement to read it with a ! At the end because that's the "vibe".

Holy shit what an upgrade in paternal grandfathers

It is both a blessing and a curse to be the only Ilya folks generally know

2026 nuclear family meme— featuring Fritzi as Neurodivergent Aunt, Sluggo as Sluggo, Nancy as Daughter, Nancy Jr as Woke Dog

"You have to honor the troops' sacrifice! You have to respect the troops!" You know who has the least respect for troops, in my experience? The troops. Ask any veteran and they'll tell you about all the dipshits, fuck-ups, and foiled school shooters they deployed with.

Rowan, you are both correct and valid

An older Tumblr post from 2022 where the now-deactivated OP posts KILL DIE THE VIOLENCE GUY with a picture of Bill Nye edited to look malevolent. Two more users reply with "*KILL!! KILL!!! KILL!!! KILL!!! KILL*" and "VIOLENCE RULES!"

The frontline PvP diehards on my timeline

My D&D players met a new NPC:

I walked into a god damn glass door at the office in front of my manager and now I have a FUCKING fat lip and a bruise on my cheekbone.

I told you WFH was safer.

A Women News headline reading “Jacobs and Diemer Welcomes the 6th Woman of the Firm Ilya Johnson” with a very accurate stick figure drawing

Finally made it to the cover of a magazine*!

*in-house publication

Me, pulling up Wake Up Dead Man: We’re gonna watch our favorite gay gentleman detective!

Joel: Poirot?

Me: Okay our SECOND favorite gay gentleman detective.

(We only JUST reactivated Netflix yesterday so we haven’t seen it yet)

Frieren bravely explores the concept of being a weird old person who has to talk to normal young coworkers