Stoney Danza

*building a homemade truck bomb using fireworks but accidentally only using snakes and it kills me like Jigglypuff's final smash*

At least Germans never had to worry about Hitler popping up in The Nanny or Just Shoot Me

New world view just dropped: everything someone says is good is a lie or a scam, and every possible bad thing you can imagine is currently happening funded by your labor

UB takes me out of Magic. Not like, the world lore or whatever, but the game itself. When I look at a card and see a ninja turtle head as the set symbol, it's like oh yeah every corporation is just stripping themselves for parts and this is just another piece of that

Not to be a European, all "jør breäd is like cæke" but Jets tastes like a sheet cake with pizza toppings

I know ai isn't conscious because it hasn't started sexually rejecting these dopes that jork to it!

lol not at a woman being murdered, but at my ass for letting the show trick me every episode

Fatal Vows is my favorite TV show comma docu-drama category because you go into every episode thinking "of course the husband is the murderer" but then part way through you're like "maybe the wife did it because this guy's a monster that deserves slaying" but then in the end the husband did it lol

I'm sorry to be a Stranger Commenting, but I'm not seeing any nanners in these pictures. Have you found pollen?

Hellacious Crumb

My retirement plan? Why, the class action lawsuit for mesothelioma 2 caused by working with rockwool of course!

I'm super glad AI is not even remotely conscious. Imagine living like LLMs work. Like to experience the next moment you have to live your whole life again. Torture. Hell life.

Goddamn Wile E. Coyote ass genocidaires

I got jumpscared by someone I kind of knew when I was 19 being on Um Actually

One million dollars to someone that solves the problem of resin from a joint dripping on your lips. Like, maybe an alcohol wipe that's also moisturizing magically.

The domino meme where the small one is labeled "Flim-flam man in the 1800's wants to sell more bibles" and the big one is "Me starving during nuclear winter"

Yaas 👏👏👏 we MUST lift up a select group of people ABOVE others! We must step on the poor until they are dust!

I'm at the first commercial break on The Rise and Fall of Reggie Dinkins and all I can say is that it's the best TV show I've ever seen, my absolute favorite

Thank you! I have been wondering if I should vote for you and now I know I shouldn't!

Operation Based Epic Bacon

folks theyre saying the pale rider doesnt want us to break the seventh seal, theyre saying no one has the strength to handle it. what do you think folks, what do you think of that pale rider. should we do it?

*crowd going absolutely ape shit*

i dont know, i want to but they say I shouldnt

You're just the worst. Move out of the way for people capable of compassion.

I'm so sick of living in the terrorist country :(

Everyone is talking about UB and Turtles and I don't want to waffle anyone's pancakes in the comments, so I'll just say that I'm bummed that there are only three pre-releases left in the year I might go to with only one of them being actively exciting. I like in-person sealed

Seething with rage, I'm going to search "Gavin Newsom" on here to find someone to fight

Again, medically paranoid but I'm now convinced that same name email was just a phishing scam or someone trying to pin a crime on me lol

Good news! The economy in the '20s is roaring! This phrase evokes nothing bad and I am smart to say this

Taking a vow of silence and only my wife notices

A SKELATEN WHOSE COVERED IN CATS AND CAT HAIR , JUST BECUASE I LOOK LIKE A BUCH OF SHIT DONT THINK THAT MEANS IM GOOD AT MY LIFE OR IM DOING WELL IN OTHER WAYS , ITS POSSIBLE IF NOT COMMON FOR MANY PEOPLE INCLUDING THE SKELETEN IN THE PIC TO EAT SHIT IN EVERY AREA OF LIFE, BELOW AVERAGE INCOME, BELOW AVERAGE PERSONALTY, BELOW AVERAGE DIET, BUT TO A TREE YOU MOVE THROUGH SPACE LIKE A DAMB GHOST, TO A FALLEN LOG YOU ARE THE MASTER OF BEING UPRIGHT , TO A FROG YOU ARE THE DRYEST THING HES EVER SEEN, TO THE FROST ON EARLY SPRING GRASS YOU STEAM WITH WARMTH, GO INTO THE WOODS!!! GO INTO THE WOODS BEFORE THERE ALL GONE!!! GO INTO THE WOODS NOW!!!!!!!! DASHARE.ZONE ADMIN

THINK ABOUT IT - dashare.zone ADMIN

Googling "how to be normal guy -ai -betterhelp"