user number 290,395 on bluesky dot social

if Artturi Lehkonen accidentally spilled hot soup in my lap I’d sit real still and let him finish it if he wanted

hot take: Rantanen is getting too many boos, and Duchene is not getting enough boos

Charlie Coyle doing a 10:30pm D league turnover in a playoff game, not a big deal

you’ll find the Brock Nelson Avs jerseys on the clearance rack tucked behind the Bates Battaglia and Chris Gratton jerseys

if Brock Nelson has any honor he will commit hockey seppuku and re-sign with the Islanders

Connor Hellabroke

get stoned and watch a loop of the swedish chef dancing around the kitchen to “kids” by mgmt

good, we didn’t deserve to win that game. Play dickhead hockey win dickhead prizes

they should make Brock Nelson buy a ticket to get into game 4

remember when everyone made fun of Duchene because he looked like his horse just died instead of making fun of him for showing up at photo day with Cosmo Kramer’s haircut

Jamie Benn uses a spoon to eat pizza

brb setting my entire neighborhood on fire

It’s been 25 years in the Dallas arena and they still haven’t moved the camera angle higher so the hyuk-hyuks in the lower bowl don’t block half the ice standing late in games and in OT

I really missed my skeleton trying to turn my skin inside out at 1 AM hoping someone wearing the right colors puts a rubber thing in a net

Wonderful to have a Drury on the roster in the playoffs again

it took Steve Yzerman 14 years and half the Soviet Olympic team to win a cup as a player, once someone tells him the USSR no longer exists im sure he will figure out a backup Yzerplan

if the Hurricanes hadn’t traded for Logan Stankoven the score would be 1-1 right now but they did

I said “yep” when asked if I have a massive stiffy right now

pack Keaton Middleton in a big crate and mail him to Abu Dhabi like Garfield and Nermal

Teddy Blueger is the villain in Temu Nightmare On Elm Street

wow just felt it move

Akira Shidd

if I have to see Keaton Middleton more than two times in the next three months im going to screw lightbulbs into my eyeballs and make them flash on and off like a jukebox

I’d pay Artturi Lehkonen $200 a day to send me a good morning text

Im about to offer this bar $25,000 for this painting of Kermit the Frog and Mean Gene Okerlund

Avs need to hire someone to chaperone Nichushkin through the playoffs to make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid, bonus points if it’s someone funny and they make a movie out of it. Like Rick Moranis or Wayne Brady

I don’t know if it’s eventually going to be not funny but for now watching Charlie Coyle have at least two “oh shit we just got the puck back and now I have to skate fast” moments a game is very funny

saddledome is the best arena in the nhl for tv viewing. Low camera angle, good lighting, the uniforms always look great