Captain's Crew

Seeing people contemplate suicide breaks my heart so much 💔

I feel the need to talk with them, even just to take their mind off of it

Got an anxiety attack that was SO bad that I had to vent my thoughts into a short blog post

I dont know if I want to post this on my website yet 🤔

I mean, it still has a chance of every weapon gets 3rd kits

Maybe this has something to do with how I was traumatized by my dad when I was growing up? He is an emotionally abusive man, and it did force me into a mindset rooted in toxic masculinity, in a sense.

You know what I hate about how I process feelings? I don't feel a certain way when I should be. Like I'm suppressing myself.

When somebody gushes about my artwork, I don't feel as happy as I should be.

When I see something that's tearjerking, I don't feel as sad as I should be.

FACTS™

YESSSS I LOVE PORTAL 2

Who’s on board the Madleen Gaza flotilla, and where has it reached so far? The 12-person crew, including climate activist Greta Thunberg, is expected to reach Gaza on June 7.

Today I learned that a French-Palestinean member of parliament is on board the Freedom Flotilla

All I'm saying is that if the boat is attacked, then it's likely gonna be a declaration of war

And if the USA gets involved in war, then I want NOTHING to do with it

www.aljazeera.com/news/2025/6/...

This says nothing about their level of skill/talent, mind you

idk, I think I just feel bad for doing that to one artist in particular despite getting a complete image in the end

starting to think that if I commission an artist and I make over a dozen suggestions for adjustments on the piece they're making for me, then maybe I shouldn't be commissioning them in the first place ⚰️

can't sleep, and my mind spiraled in so many directions that I once thought about how difficult it is for me to have a romantic relationship & felt sad because of it 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

her sheer might cannot be contained

well, it could either be straight up lactose intolerance, or you need to try A2 milk

If all else fails, go for alternatives like oat milk

No promises if I can get this ready to post on my website, but I'm starting the feel better then more time I spend unpacking my feelings about this wretched person

I've been having prolonged depression since yesterday, and apparently the cure is to write an essay about Jossi 💀💀💀

I don't know, and that's what bothers me! And I never will know unless someone says something

All I can do is try to keep myself from getting extremely anxious & depressed from just thinking about that friend group that I wronged in the past

The trauma still feels fresh, even one year later

Like, I already feel the guilt & trauma from my harmful actions that led to me getting ousted from that friend group, so seeing anyone from that group makes wanna turn away

But I wonder if that person I stumbled upon from that group feels guilty too? Or traumatized by my past actions?

Couldn't finish my breakfast this morning cuz I started thinking too hard about a person I ran into on a livestream chat yesterday

That same person was from a friend group that I was booted out from last year

I can't help but wonder if they don't want to have anything to do with me

I'm already IN the US cuz I've been there my whole life rn, so I'm considering moving out of country if I can

I have been thinking a lot about moving out to Chicago, but seeing how the US is crumbling over the past four months, I might as well go somewhere in Canada idk 😐

I've been using my graphics tablet for YEARS and never had the need to use a screen tablet

I think this comes down to me being stubborn & unable to afford the price or space for a screen tablet haha

Genuinely thinking of contingency plans in the event that I'm gonna be priced out of Nintendo games, to the point where I can only buy like two or three games per year

I'm going thru the stages of grief on this one 😭

nevermind, lol

I'm about to write a hate filled short essay about Nintendo's outrageous pricing on Switch2 games 😡

ngl I have had such a rough experience with working on a game jam with a team that I want to remake my game project on my own

In their defense, everyone on my team is autistic, and autistic people are famously known for not communicating well, which is our biggest problem rn

Mental illness got so strong that I ended my livestream one hour early :'(

I need more politicians to be more proactive & stop being cowards in the face of fascism cuz these continuing reports of people getting kidnapped by ICE agents & random plane crashes should never be happening!

Batta SWWIIIIIIING ⚾

Wildfires never got close to my town, so I was fretting over nothing 😭

But at least it didn't get that bad! Now I have to shift my stress onto a different thing: a game jam 😅

Checking the forecast and it seems like the worst of the strong wind weather will be in the late afternoon & the evening

I just hope we don't get a wildfire close to home in this 8-hour time period