if my mental were better id probably be sm better off but alas its been like 10 years of mental instability and a year of actual crippling depression before ive finally gotten a clearer brain and ill just have to claw my way out of this ditch
idk its probably my illness speaking and none of the people i treasure would judge me like that but on the other hand a few people /have/ judged me and theyre not in contact with me anymore so like . my insanity has a reason at least
tbh i struggle with feelings of inferiority bc i feel like some of my older friends dont want to talk to me anymore after the mental illness got to me and ive slipped so far beneath their level but one of the brightest people i know reached out to reconnect recently and i feel so honored
I had crepes with a friend today I feel so much less insane and .... man i love my friends sm
somebody on bird app told me that takaki probably asks to kiss aston first and coaches aston about it while aston gets flustered but aston ends up being the one wanting more and asking to yeah ... you get it
because hes still in the debris mindset and probably had shit happen to him despite being raised like an attack dog ,,, i dont think hed be comfortable with rship stuff and personal space unless takaki is forward about it and wants to try stuff out so like yeah
takaki aston a bit weird i feel like aston right takaki left just by virtue of takaki being a bit more insane and aston being a bit more submissive but i do understand people that push takaki right because hes prettier its just that i dont think aston would be able to touch takaki
i really like tsukasa bc their story is like mental illness + genderqueer + budding queer romance and tsukasa subaru cp is so woke being a nonbinary lesbian rship where one is disabled
tsukasa from .hack truly a genderqueer icon i love them sm
.hack好きだ…新作マジで楽しみ😂 これは前描いた司
tsukasa, greeted by bear, mimiru, and subaru on a platform in dun loireag
welcome back #dothacksign
트친님 알티하시고 주부스턴 귀여운 하셔서 개웃음 주부스턴...,,,
이 그림 ㅈㅉ 너무 좋음 수제연성 1위고 가끔 생각남 그림이 좀 더럽죠 & 팔 길이가 이상하죠 그치만 너무 좋다
저 토요일 저녁 ㄱㄴ
this life is so not for anybody i humbly request all other guys to leave
hehe i got dates bc ramadan
man grad school the concept is so confusing wdym im here in a room with X # of other people who are not even getting paid minimum wage and work like 12h/day
euugh lets do one more gesture drawing before bed ... lets become asian artist...
tbh kinda want to bribe my friends into watching the relevant ibo episodes with me bc tkas is married period in my eyes and idk if im hallucinating or this is normal . i need somebody to keep me in check
Kinda feel bad for using this as personal note app but bird app has too many eyes on me and i feel like overbearing otaku sometimes ahahaha this is messed up maybe
probably looks like Aston bored as hell during recovery while both Takaki and Fuka are at their jobs/school because hes never been given time to rest and he doesnt really know what to do by himself
Aston alive AU is interesting to think about bc I dont think hed quit Tekkadan without being severely injured but also his strengths are with fighting so I imagine he goes into cooking/baking/some other kind of food thing which is more manual labor but less about fighting but the interim period
Fuka doesnt really know what Takaki went through and Takaki refuses to tell her in case he starts making excuses for himself so Fuka just returns home from school and finds her brother a wreck and the TV is on
and nobody talks about it i imagine he had to check out of work that day because his hands were trembling and he couldnt control his emotions
takaki aston still has me thinking a lot of the time bc i cant imagine takaki got therapy after all that and i dont think he looks comfortable talking to fuka about it so hes probably having to process it on his own but then boom mcguilis the guy who killed aston is like i have Baal now
people really want to turn a blind eye to politics until it hits them irl and i think this country is too small and the government has too much power for people to try to be oblivious but nobody seems to notice until something goes to shit
did wonders for my anxiety because before i was fretting about delayed academics possibly pulling me back in the future but in the grand scheme of things that really doesnt seem to matter that much haha idk ,, honestly one of the reasons ive delayed studies is bc of the funding cuts asw so
man today i was outside shopping for clothes and then boom democracy went offline this country is never going to actually get rid of the possibility of a millitary coup and frankly thats scarier than the guys up north
been nonstop drawing for the past few days and its maybe time i take a break... everything looks so ugly
dude bsky is not allowing me to scroll at all past the first like 10 post this is truly gods sign to me to just log in scream and gtfo
