Our tabby cat, Zuzu languishing in the stripes of sunlight coming through the blinds.
Our Zuzu, stretching out a chonky arm whilst languishing in stripes of warm sunshine and pondering when the tangerine buffoon will finally drop the fuck dead. #Caturday
So, let me get this straight....men have demonstrably fucked the world up to an eye-watering degree, but they want to make sure women are kept down so men can carrying on fucking everything up?
This planet is exhausting.
Screenshot of an ad with four pictures of women in a grid and across the middle, it says "4Skincare products"
Not 100% sure they thought this ad through.
If the Strait of Hormuz situation happened during WW1, you just know that s/one with a large moustache would've fashioned some kind of container to strap to a pigeon+we'd all be taught at school about the heroism of Bernard the oil pigeon and his friends who airlifted the oil out 250ml at a time.
Cute conversation between a grandad and grandson in the supermarket: GS: "I want cookie dough, I've never had that before" GD: *with a slight Japanese lilt* "Kookeedo?" GS: "cookie dough" GD: *stronger accent* "Kukeeeeeedo?" GS: "COOKIE DOUGH, Grandad" *pause* GD: "Nope, dunno"
7yrs since I overheard this conversation in supermarket and it still makes me smile.
Makes it very clear which two parties need catapulting into the sun.
An old painting showing a toddler dressed as Pierrot lifting an unwilling black cat. The toddler is labelled 'Monday', the cat is labelled 'Me'.
Happy birthday! Have a really lovely day 😊
Just came off a phone call to my lovely Mum. Took a few minutes to figure out who she was talking about when she said "Who's that tall lad? Looks like a big pencil".
It was Barron Trump.
Screen shot of a post saying "My son has never seen Indiana Jones and doesn't know anything about it. Tonight, he asked what it was about and I said "An archaeologist (in the loosest sense) who goes on adventures". He thought about it for a minute and then said "OK, so what happens to her?". *HER*...good lad. Beneath this is a photo of me on excavation in Pompeii in 1997.
7yrs ago, I posted this on the other place because I loved that my young son assumed Indiana Jones was a woman because all the real life archaeologists he knew (inc me) were women.
I instantly had an angry man in my replies telling me it was ridiculous. I mumsplained him till him apologised. #iwd
Me, balancing in my slippers along the edge of the bath between the paint pot and the next bit of ceiling.
A paintbrush stuck into a hole in the middle of a Chinese takeaway tub, plugged around the edges with kitchen roll and secured with a sandwich bag tie. This isn't going to work is it?....
Following yesterday's splatter/dribble-fest, I'm going into bathroom ceiling coat #2 with more prep.
"Good afternoon, Dragons... I'm looking for £50K investment to cover costs for kitchen roll, sandwich bag ties and still vaguely fragrant Chinese takeaway tubs"
As if America's reputation wasn't sullied enough, I've just found out they don't put butter on their sandwiches and find it weird that we do.
I mean....horses for courses and all that but.....wtf?
Is it too much to hope that the last person in this chain of lunatic sycophants is about to plunge a fork into a mains socket?
Great that they've used the same varnish on the desk and the buffoon's face though. Efficient.
An expression of sheer cringe.
Next time I aggressively flip the finger from my kitchen window at the neighborhood bully cat, I'm going to check that the old lady over the back isn't standing at her bedroom window.
Teenage boy looking incredibly stressed and potentially angry with the veins in his forehead bulging.
There's a special place in Hell for the person who came up with the Skoda ad on Spotify consisting entirely of dogs barking and whining.
Headline saying "The oldest butthole ever found is a 290 million year old fossil" underneath a photo of said fossilised butthole.
And there was me thinking the oldest butthole on earth was Donald Trump.
Love that you're hearing it out in the wild. I'm still just ridiculously chuffed you like it.
NHS poster saying "Could it be sepsis?"
Take That's less successful single of course.
I've spent this morning leaping between a thread on Iran and your 15hr potatoes and just realised, I'm way more invested in the potatoes.
Our cat, Zuzu pondering potential Armageddon whilst languishing in a patch of sunshine on a colourful rug.
My #Caturday pic today is a visual metaphor for when the world seems dark and depressing, make sure you always find yourself a patch of warm sunshine. There will always be one.
Some junk mail I got in the post today. Across the bottom of the envelope in large, yellow cursive writing it says "The Spirit for Change".....except with slightly squiffy eyes it looks like "Clunge". Probably just me having screwed my eyes by staring at spreadsheets all afternoon but hey ho, make of it what you will.
Either my eyesight is worse than I thought or this charity really needs to re-think their font choices because I read this as 'The Spirit for Clunge'.
Woman wearing glasses leaning forward, straining to see something in the distance.
Sat in traffic this morning, I spotted a little bird. It looked a bit dishevelled+wobbly on its feet+I felt genuine concern as it tried to peck at a slice of abandoned bread.
Turns out it was a ripped poo bag half trapped under the bread+ flapping in the wind.
Really need to wear my glasses more.
Possibly a Western conifer seed bug. Usually native the US but have been in the UK for a good 20yrs.
Scene from Mad Men where Don Draper is in the middle of pitching an idea
Life360 but for tracking colleagues in your workplace so you can successfully navigate the corridors and staff room whilst avoiding thin-lipped smiles and buttock-clenchingly awkward small talk.
I'm so pleased you like it! 😊
Yes, the love was one-sided. Yes, I got my heart broken but this song was the soundtrack to the most cinematically romantic moment of my entire life.
youtu.be/6QImCMjW-PM?...
A phone notification from Amazon saying "Christmas cart?? Presents sorted??".
Not entirely sure how many 'fuck off's are needed for Amazon here but I feel it's a fair few.
A red, knitted hat with a plaited tassle coming from the top. It's a hat that was first knitted in Norway during WW2 to protest the Nazi occupation.
Me wearing the hat mentioned in the first photo.
I finished my Norwegian anti-Nazi hat! Didn't go perfectly and my knitting isn't top-notch but I did my best.
Thanks Sam 🤗x
