TragicallyUnhip

what if we all just started screaming what then

Getting the supreme car wash because I love sour cream

sorry I can’t come to the phone right now, I just don’t want to

Went to see a Tragically Hip tribute band tonight at the local Legion in Nelson BC. Can’t get much more Canadian than that.

Me: the holy Roman empire was not holy, Roman, or an empire

Wife: I meant what do you think about the new curtains

cheeseburger so good you forget that you’re driving

screenshot of press release from four nations with their logos: Tla’amin Nation; Homalco Nation; K'ómoks Nation; Klahoose Nation. March 11, 2026 Chiefs from four First Nations communities are urging the public to please approach Aaron Gunn with no caution whatsoever. He is completely harmless, though momentarily unsettled by the alarming possibility that someone might acknowledge the land before a meeting. Yesterday on social media, the MP appeared to crash out and demand to speak to the manager of land acknowledgements, a position that observers confirm does not exist. Chiefs whose territories make up the riding had two words for the MP - Chillax, Bud. Land acknowledgements have never seized private property, cancelled a mortgage, repossessed a pickup truck, or altered a single title deed anywhere in Canada. They are simply people recognizing the history of the place where they are standing. No one is going anywhere. Canada will survive the brief moment of honesty. Until then, Chiefs across the region continue to reassure the public that land acknowledgements have not, to date, resulted in any land back. Hegus John Hackett, Tla’amin Nation Chief Darren Blaney, Homalco Nation Chief Nicole Rempel, K'ómoks Nation Chief Kevin Peacey, Klahoose Nation

Posted by the Tla’amin Nation on Facebook. This is epic.

𝗠𝗣 𝗰𝗿𝗮𝘀𝗵𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗼𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗺𝗹𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗹𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗮𝗰𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗹𝗲𝗱𝗴𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀
𝙇𝙤𝙘𝙖𝙡 𝘾𝙝𝙞𝙚𝙛𝙨 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙚 𝘼𝙖𝙧𝙤𝙣 𝙂𝙪𝙣𝙣: “𝘾𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙡𝙖𝙭, 𝙗𝙪𝙙.”
www.facebook.com/tlaaminnatio...

Her: Have you seen the dog bowl?

Him: No but I’ve seen him catch a tennis ball

“ah well, there’s your problem,” I confidently say as I point to myself

I’m all cheese no cracker

If I were “rich”, I’d be considered “eccentric” and not a “dirtbag” who uses “air quotes”

As an author I should have known the shitstorm I would unleash from the Audubon Society when I misinterpreted the age old writing advice, 'kill your darlings' as 'kill your starlings'. Bit of a mess on the patio to clean up as well.

everything went downhill after the dinosaurs died

no longer allowed to listen to Wake Me Up Before You Go Go while pumping gas

i have a sneaking suspicion. i have regular suspicions too, but this one is pretty sneaky

"YOU'RE DEAD TO ME"

Me on my first day as a mortician

I recently went axe throwing for the first time, and I learned three things:

1. I have terrible aim.
2. Waffle House is not an axe throwing venue.
3. Waffle House and its customers are very litigious.

Ariel was kind of a bitch to not give Flounder an actual name

I just want someone to call me Gaston

Is there any day that people give less of a shit about than Thursday?

The way things are going… it’s time to stock up on Slim Jim’s and Jolt Cola.

is it “chalk full of nuts” or “chock full of nuts” i want to get this love letter just right

No one shoots at your feet and tells you to dance anymore

“Good news!” he happily declared, clearly in the middle of a psychotic break.

Cancelling plans is okay. Putting yourself first is okay. Going for a long walk is okay. Abandoning society is okay. Moving into a cave with a family of raccoons is okay. Giving them tiny swords & shields is okay. Do what you need to do to cope.

"what's your fucking problem"?
- me as a couples intimacy counselor

Me: that's Walter under the bridge
Friend: it's "water" lol
Me: *pointing to a body as it floats down the river* no

As a society we're becoming increasingly polarised and intolerant of others' opinions. Only an idiot would deny that.