impish cüntress

its about that time for things to stop happening

The computers are right to give up on us

give him a popsicle and pay very close attention..

shooting myself in the ass.

what if the spaghetti noodle is made an entirely different way than we think..

in ohio if you admit that you have read an entire book, half of the people will try to elect you to be a leader and the other half will try to set you on fire. but if you can evade them for 12 hours they'll forget. its like the police stars on Grand Theft Auto

maybe just a little chomp on the leg

scampering about the woods for twigs and sticks to start a fire then dude told me to get off his property, ugly sticks anyway.

ive quite frankly gotten used to every genre of strange and unusual occurrence

they should write a song about an electric feel

hear that? im whistlin u over like a good dog, commear boy xkissykissxx

sry cant chill a witch cast a spell on me and now i cant stop layin phat eggs

they don’t even have eric andre harassing people at the rnc any more

telling everyone at the psych ward I’m a bluesky elder

bein a cunt aint easy

how is everyone? jk I don't give a FUCK

tellin my boss she should be nicer to me cause if she even cared to check i now have 0 outstanding warrants and only one new charge (jaywalking)

the only 'morally wrong' i do now is steal from walmart and flash my tits on accident cause im a complete imp while under the influence.

no pamphlets pls i already know everything

parasocial activity

speaking to my boss in the mickey mouse voice as a way of making her hate and avoid me forever

im scared of horny 21 year olds

there should be more forces beyond my control

stealing as a sin was conceptualized far before economic mechanisms of alienation god doesn’t know what a corporation is.

wow thats wild man u should try drinking tide about it and lmk how u feel in an hour

just think popsicles are better enjoyed by the male race. i bite mine

sensitive ppl should rly be subjected to misplaced feelings of others and such, then they should go a little crazy. it will be a hoot

hiding from them silly freaks on twitter is gonna give me word vomit