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Jane Altoids

@staticbluebat

I am a famous celebrity of world renown. I am also the Broke Poet.

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02.05.2023
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Latest posts by Jane Altoids @staticbluebat

I think Calvin Klein's underwear is extremely ugly to unremarkable. But I applaud their new ad spot staring Dakota Johnson doing softcore porn.

09.03.2026 14:47 πŸ‘ 10 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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Poem

09.03.2026 21:10 πŸ‘ 9 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

They will put Jane Altoids in movies or my name isn’t Jane Altoids

09.03.2026 19:06 πŸ‘ 9 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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Poem

09.03.2026 00:44 πŸ‘ 11 πŸ” 3 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I don’t agree but I get why you think so lol

09.03.2026 01:34 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Simon Simone

09.03.2026 00:55 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Lol yeah there was no universe where I saw you liking this one.

09.03.2026 00:54 πŸ‘ 8 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

That is true Simone

09.03.2026 00:53 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
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Poem

09.03.2026 00:44 πŸ‘ 11 πŸ” 3 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
Castration Movie 3 Campaign Video support castration movie 3 at castrationmovie.com

Today we launched the crowdfunder for Castration Movie Anthology iii. Year of the Hyaena. Thank you so much to everyone for supporting weird indie Canadian queer cinema! www.kickstarter.com/projects/wea...

vimeo.com/1160430885?s...

06.03.2026 23:22 πŸ‘ 37 πŸ” 21 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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08.03.2026 23:07 πŸ‘ 7 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I have never in my life heard of this and I consider myself pretty well versed, does not seem to be essential in any way lol

07.03.2026 05:40 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
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07.03.2026 02:32 πŸ‘ 15 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0
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Some issues have come up with my apartment that require me to spend more money than I am used to for this pay period in addition to rent. Anything helps and it will make gas & groceries for the next two weeks less stressful.

27.02.2026 03:07 πŸ‘ 14 πŸ” 25 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

This was my list btw I don’t think I posted it here

06.03.2026 18:10 πŸ‘ 9 πŸ” 4 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Persona felt that way to me lol

06.03.2026 16:59 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
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05.03.2026 01:00 πŸ‘ 26 πŸ” 5 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

its bandcamp friday so grab some great music ~

ravineangel.bandcamp.com/album/object...

youthagainstsatan.bandcamp.com/album/speak-...

06.03.2026 10:04 πŸ‘ 12 πŸ” 4 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

That's how growing up in Hutchinson Kansas was

06.03.2026 16:54 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
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How’s it going please ignore the gash on my forehead from tripping while I was sick and slamming my face into my keyboard the other day

06.03.2026 04:13 πŸ‘ 17 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0

The Great British Albums List strikes again

06.03.2026 00:03 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Yeah him and Road Dogg were both probably going to get picked up for Bischoff’s WCW reset lol I really don’t think it would have been much better than 02 TNA

05.03.2026 21:29 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

"here's every guy with name value we could grab up on the outs with WWE right now and Stevie Ray"

05.03.2026 21:22 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

I did get a genuine laugh out of the teacher introducing the Million Dollar Cook-Off to the class and having to immediately be like β€œYOU DON’T ACTUALLY WIN A MILLION DOLLARS, that’s just the total amount of scholarship money they give out”.

05.03.2026 20:04 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

While I was writing this I remembered the Escape From Horrorland FMV game, R.L. Stine is also responsible for my love of point and clicks. Dude rewrote whole sections of my brain.

05.03.2026 17:51 πŸ‘ 5 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

-trying to do engagement bait- What’s a type of pornography that’s legal but immoral

05.03.2026 01:42 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 1 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

One of the times you pull one I’ve seen, it’s fine. Decent kids film

05.03.2026 17:13 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

If they were the real geniuses behind the band, the album they made as β€œThe Heads” in the 90s when Byrne refused to reunite with them would have been something people liked lol

05.03.2026 04:44 πŸ‘ 7 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Oh I thought there was at least 3

04.03.2026 04:27 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0
Preview
The Greatest Movies of All Time (According to Trans People) β€” From the Front Row What makes a great film? Does film hold an innate greatness - or is greatness in the eye of the beholder? Cinephiles love lists. Critics make annual top ten lists. Sight and Sound magazine holds its p...

The Greatest Films of All Time (According to Trans People)!

I polled more than 40 transgender and non-binary filmmakers, film critics, and cinephiles to find out which films trans folks connected to most. Check it out below!

02.03.2026 13:42 πŸ‘ 269 πŸ” 135 πŸ’¬ 7 πŸ“Œ 43