Fake Physical Therapy Statistics

Here it is! From comparing the tuition for each institution in March Madness with a DPT Program, its the Most Expensive DPT Program Final Four! Watch this spot for updates on who will be crowned the winner.

I'm currently accepting offers for PT Program commencement speaker engagements, productivity meeting pep talks, and on a sliding scale, talking to your patients on the Nu-Step about the weather and March Madness while you drink coffee and catch up on documentation in the office.

This is just a reminder that you completed 0% of the makeup documentation you promised yourself that you'd take care of over the weekend.

After months of advocacy, Minnesota Senate Bill 6834 has passed, which officially adds "passive aggressive range of motion" to the state practice act.

A complaint has been filed regarding the #APTACSM BINGO space for those who knew/ learned my true identity. Please note that the 85% of this content is cringe. It's embarrassing enough for these individuals, they carry a heavy burden, leave them alone.

#APTACSM Program Update: The session entitled "Reelin' Them In: Strategies To Increase Productivity" is accidentally scheduled next door at The Houston Fishing Show. We apologize and all in attendance will receive a free lure.

you want to find me at #APTACSM, I'll probably just loiter by the Nu-Step booth until they politely ask me to leave.

Here's the official 2025 #APTACSM BINGO card! It's going to be epic with some amazing prizes. For those attending, please help get the word out. #CSM2025

Here are the official 2025 #APTACSM BINGO prizes. Who doesn't love crappy keychains! I'll have 20 of these burning a hole in my pocket. Watch for the official BINGO card being released in a few days! #CSM2025

Hang your poster well and one of these major awards can be yours next week. #APTACSM #CSM2025.

#APTACSM BINGO sneak peak! Presenters, adding #fakeptstats content not only helps your colleagues, but also increases the odds of uncomfortable silence in a session by 43%.

The official shoe of Physical Therapists over 50.

#APTACSM poster presenters, start practicing hanging your poster now! 97% of award winners from CSM 2024 received promotion, tenure, or a dream job offer within days. A cadre of judges with a keen eye for spatial dimensions will be on hand in Houston.

57% of PTs have already given up on Dry Hydrocollator January.

In 2025, believe in yourself like a chiropractor treating colic.

Building a snowman with a patient can be legally billed as 2 units of therapeutic activity, 1 unit of neuromuscular re-education and 1 unit of cryotherapy

As a reminder, any treatment session involving multiple lords a-leaping must be billed as therapeutic activity with a group therapy modifier.

The Wisconsin Functional Shoulder Scale consists of assessing a patient's ability to affix a Culver's drive through sticker without pain or substitution.

It was quite the year!

I'll take it.

In the Midwest, calculating 80% 1RM is achieved by slowing increasing resistance until the patent says "Uff da".

Home Health PTs can visually estimate the weight of any household object within half a pound.

67% of Thanksgiving house fires are due to placing a frozen turkey directly into a hydrocollator.

"Physical therapy students shouldn't have to pay full tuition during clinical education".