howl

can confirm

meeee

i am in the market for a spiteful, malevolent entity if anyone can get me in touch with one

now that planned parenthood is facing being defunded, i am looking into alternative birth control methods, such as having my bloodline cursed

mormon boomers be like i hate my bitch wives

yes i said i was going to bed but then i saw something funny and had to share it. i lied! still awake!

i'm a terrible liar unless it's not on purpose in which case i'm a great liar

given the level of violence in the world can we please have the actual gun emoji back. what is me having a gun emoji to an escalating proxy war. 🔫

i haven't been ok since yesterday we owe our queer elders so much

I'M SO SORRY I FINISHED THE SECOND HALF OF THE DOCUMENTARY I'M SO GLAD HE WAS GAY AND WAS LOVED THROUGH TO THE END OF HIS LIFE I'M CRYING I'M CRYING

god fuck he's so fucking hot

i am in love with paul reubens i wish he wasn't gay and dead

MEEEEE

beautiful women in my phone texting me Rx: READY

The pharmacy has your Rx ready for pickup.

PHOTO ID REQUIRED

a take I've seen is he's already accomplished what he needs to in terms of harvesting data and getting access to accounts, saying he's getting out takes that heat off to operate under the radar

same with the cpap!

there was a whole 4ch*n thread about a guy who ate meal pellets meant for primates in zoos so maybe that's an option

need to hang out with a horse soon

me: i need white boy noise to fall asleep

some idiot: do you mean white noise?

me: no (STARTS BLASTING ROLLIN' [AIR RAID VEHICLE] BY LIMP BIZKIT)

✅

I have been reading Mistborn and enjoying it and in the midst of my extreme stress/social burnout it's the thing that i look forward to the most. good fiction is divine

i want the biggest bed possible not because i want to sleep in it but because i want to crawl under it and hide like a cat you never see

A screenshot Brandon Sanderson's wikipedia page stating that Jeopardy! 74-win streak owner and current Jeopardy! host Ken Jennings was one Sanderson's roommates at BYU

been watching Jeopardy! with @kenjennings.bsky.social every weekday evening and then going to bed reading Mistborn by @brandonsanderson.com, and come to find out they out they were roommates?

Thanks for making my evenings relaxing and my sleep schedule consistent, fellas

been doing alchemy all this time and didn't know

i won't tell anyone if i got the job but there will be signs (paying off the rest of my credit card and medical debt)

peak unrestricted internet access as a child era

omg :((

three days of sleep deprivation put this in my notes app open blue sky read this tweet felt a little delusional

got a hearty chuckle. you've still got it