Puzzlebombs

The things he can do with jowls and feet would shock you

i dont think kissing him would be so bad

one time when i worked at the mall all the toilets started to barf up this heaving dark red slime. when the plumbers got there one of them saw the lake of it that had formed in one of the bathrooms and said “Aww, they just wanted to come up and check out the sales!”

Turns out it was worms.

we had just been talking about Buster Scruggs too. how did he think i wouldnt notice

yeah voice channel

Manhattan! funniest premise and kills and all the new york stuff is great. not too concerned with the ending being dumb.

Kroger. they got banan straw and banan blueb and baban choc. i am gonna make a mix drink with it

this shit is phenomenomenal

appreciate you covering these as well

Fuck yall and your assumptions - signed a black person raised in SC @chermitup.bsky.social @1technodiva.bsky.social

#veganfood

CHIKEN CORDON BLEU VEGAN FRIED CHIKEN PATTY TOPPED W/ VEG DELI SLICES, CHEEZ and AGAVE MUSTARD

second best sandwich of my life

Last Four Friday

watching allegiances disintegrate before my very eyes

(fed the dogs)

i tried to pry this off the tree and my hammer wilted like a dying flower

its actually fucking snowing.

every day I see another tepid piece of shit movie get a 4K while Mars Attacks, Wild Wild West, Sunshine, My Cousin Vinny, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Road to Perdition, and James and the Giant Peach get nothing.

You show me a “just and loving god” and I’ll show you where to put the bullet.

i got a buddy who only learns new words after he watches a coen brothers movie and he just hit me irl with ‘sobriquet’

Robocop is really really gone. he would have loved calling me out for weather posting.

muted keywords and using my
phone only to take pictures of food and play All in Hole

for one week a year we should all go back to these

it is 85 right now and the weather app claims it will be 38 and snowing at this time tomorrow

wish i could have been in the room when they were photoshopping Justine Bateman’s head onto this body. i love to laugh.

now that i have two little dogs I totally understand why parents will eat food in the bathroom

they stopped selling these because drinking two of them in a row produced glimpses of the past when you shut your eyes. i saw the Siege of Boston and George Washington was chinese

some 3 fingered bloke named Tony

had a small business owner tell me “I dont put my hours on instagram because people will still dm me asking what my hours are.”

yeah, i hate money too.

I listened to 50 Japanese ambient albums in the last week. Time to move on to jazz. going to work backwards from the most famous.