Garrett Robinson

in case you've never seen it, this is Roger Ebert on The Mummy

Three panel comic. Panel 1: three witches stand around a cauldron while one of them stirs. Panel 2: one of the witches adds a scoop of pre workout into the pot. Panel 3: the three witches are getting absolutely shredded in the gym.

Ruin a dad’s week by saying the TV display looks weird and refusing to elaborate

Holy shit. I wish I had the need and the budget for a commission right now, because your art is incredible. I'm literally stunned.

"Ducks eat for free at Subway! I was not aware."

It's only 20 years??? Thank god. Thank god. I would have guessed 40 at least.

I'm not even 40 yet. I don't know what that says about me.

"Mustard on the beat, ho"

i'm gonna start collecting gen ai haters like ash collecting pokémon.

where my gen ai hater fam at? sound off in the comments because i require a boost of artistic joy and i would like to boost your stuff because i hate gen ai and i love everyone who is on team art 👀🥰

Seagull At Sunset.
Courtesy, Dad. 🩷

Stormtrooper #1: May the fourth be with you! Stormtrooper #2: It's May the fifth. Stormtrooper #1: Damn, I missed it.

The average American has three friends

“hey baby,” i say, approaching you at the bar. “watch this”

i put a cherry stem in my mouth seductively. you look away, but eventually you can’t help but notice that i’ve managed to get it wrapped tightly around my neck. in seconds, i am dead.

There's a huge cultural assumption in the other direction too. EVERYONE tells me I'm "babysitting" when my wife's not there and it pisses me off. I'm being a fucking dad.

Han Solo showed up on Vader's death star hours after Alderaan was destroyed. On his ship he carried: Vader's son, Vader's daughter, Vader's astromech, the protocol droid Vader built as a kid, the wookie who saved Ahsoka's life, and literal Obi-Wan Kenobi back from the dead. Vader must have been very "who in the Mustafar was that fucker in the vest?!" Then something like a day later he sneaks up on Vader (one of the greatest pilots the galaxy has seen) in what is essentially a heavily modified 18-wheeler and shoots him in the ass.

Okay I don't know who number three is?

sci-fi author: in my book i invented the torment nexus as a cautionary tale. tech company: at long last, we have created the torment nexus from classic sci-fi novel don't create the torment nexus.

*taps sign*

What a view to come home to 😍

"Shouldn't parents decide what is taught in school?"

No.

Movie you’ve watched more than six times using gifs.

(“Hard mode” no Star Wars, Star Trek, or LOTR)

April 25th

Happy April 25th to all those who celebrate

I'm in this meme and I don't like it...

uh oh what’s the fifth panel gonna be

linkedin post screenshot: Ken Cheng - I want to connect with you, emotionally) Al will never be able to write like me. Why? Because | am now inserting random sentences into every post to throw off their language learning models. Any Al emulating me will radiator freak yellow horse spout nonsense. 1 wiite all my emails, That's Not My Baby and reports like this to protect my data waffle iron 40% off. 1 suggest all writers and artists do the same Strawberry mango Forklift. The robot nerds will never get the better of Ken Hey can | have whipped cream please? Cheng. We can tuna fish tango foxtrot defeat Al. We just have to talk like this. All. The. Time. Piss on carpet

unfollowing everyone on linkedin except this guy

DM: Wait, who are you?

Stranger: I’m you from the future

DM: Whoa! How does the campaign go?

Stranger:...Which one?

DM, tearing up:...You have no idea how happy that makes me.

#DnD

And while we’re at it… a friendly reminder… 🌿❤️✨

Actor Michael B. Jordan on Sesame Street posing next to vampire puppet, The Count.

Sinners (2025)