Pitch an unnecessary sequel:
Citizens Kane
12.03.2026 10:23
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Pitch an unnecessary sequel:
Citizens Kane
Gotta say that this is some extremely creepy language. And the argument basically is... that if the prevent people from treating gender dysphoria (adults, in this case), that they'll just... stop having it? That's not at all how any of this works.
Hate hate hate was Kendrick Lamar’s Plan C if Not Like Us hadn’t charted.
I want this to be true more than I believe it to be true.
Can confirm 👍👍👍👍
“He does what?”
“He likes to guess their shoe size and orders it for them.”
“And they don’t fit?”
“No, he’s comically wrong. Like, every time.”
“And they wear them anyway?”
“Yeah. See, that’s how you know how sycophantic they are. It’s symbolism.”
(beat)
“Eh. We can’t do that. It’s too on the nose.”
“this just proves MJ would average 50 in today’s NBA!” my friend if you dropped Michael Jordan into the 2026 NBA his career would last exactly one day after he found out about FanDuel
new from me: as the GOP was hammering Biden for record gas prices in 2022 i wrote that the “president does not, as [Republicans] would have you believe, have a dial in the Oval Office that he uses to set gas prices.”
shoutout to Trump for managing to find the most damaging exception to that rule
The shoe thing is low on the "important global matters" scale, but HIGH on the "I'll take things a deranged Roman emperor would do for $500, Alex" chart.
My mom has my favorite perspective on the Team USA WBC debacle, which is that having the entire deck stacked in your favor and then blowing it because you think you can't lose is the most American outcome possible
🤬🤬🤬
How to publicize your event online:
•Tell them what it is; don't assume they already know.
•Tell them when it is, where it is, who is it for.
•Put the info in searchable text, not just in an image.
•Provide a live, direct link to more info.
•Repeat, because not everyone saw it the 1st or 2nd time
Any answer other than “the president is a historically stupid man only now he has dementia” is journalistic malpractice
US watching a movie where a vigilante’s entire family is wiped out: “Oh yeah, time for fucking vengeance, this dude will never stop. Get them!”
US watching Iran pick a Supreme Leader who just had his entire family wiped out: “This guy is plainly going to be reasonable and fold.”
Exotic Dancer (L) and Robot
you say "i asked chatgpt"
i hear "i asked [an improv comedy group]"
an improv group wrote this report
instead of a therapist i use an improv comedy group
It is going to Happen, eventually, and I think we’re all going to take a week off after that.
It's literally a teenager repellent. There (thankfully just) one in my neighborhood, and sure enough their fence is three times as high as anyone else's, their dog barks at everyone, and they proudly fly a Trump flag.
If the Dems who win in the 2026 midterms get squeamish about prosecuting this administration, we'll need to elect a bunch of new people running on Nuremberg shit for 2028. This isn't a joke. It's the law. It's justice. Biden let Trump back in the WH and this happened because Joe didn't do his job
GOP congressman from Tennessee Andy Ogles posted on Ex-Twitter on March 9: “Muslims don't belong in American society. Pluralism is a lie.”
“Pluralism is a lie”
That really is the consensus on the Right: It’s all a lie, no one actually wants it, it’s all just a conspiracy orchestrated by globalist elites, it destroys the nation.
It’s the one thing that unites all the factions on the MAGA right: A rabid disdain of pluralism.
David Letterman: FRAME MOGGING! That’s what the kids say, they say he was MOGGING A FRAME
Paul Shaffer:
Stop 👏 having 👏 unrealistic 👏 body 👏 standards 👏 for 👏 camels 👏
I have consistently, since term 1, used the "family annihilator" framing when discussing the MAGA movement. Once you realize it, it's impossible to miss seeing it in everything they do.
It's important to remember that the stock market is not reflective of the value of the comnpanies listed, it is a mood ring for rich people.
HAL JORDAN: In brightest day, in blackest
BEASTIE BOYS: NIGHT!
HAL JORDAN: No evil shall escape my
BEASTIE BOYS: SIGHT!
HAL JORDAN: This is awkward because when I invited you I thought I was messaging Beast Boy from the Teen Titans.
I need people to understand that Paralympians are just as elite as Olympians.
Someone should make a miniature bulldozer that can be operated by a housecat. Generally I don't think cats should be allowed to operate bulldozers but I think we can all agree it would be pretty funny to see at least once