Eoin Starbuck, The Merchant Wizard!

He pet the jackalope as she stopped to rest on his lap.

“She reminds me of home when I'm missing it.”

He offered her a purple carrot-shaped vegetable.

He stretched out his arms and shook them about.

“Fair warnin’: She’s got a bit of a wild /hare/.”

He knew that pun wouldn't land with him yet.

Hopping from a whisp of air, a leporid shape formed from a translucent long-eared form to a fuzzy adorable shape with tall antlers.

“Meet Anne Bunny!”

“Only animal help i got is m’ familiar.

Wanna meet her?”

||: for sure

“That’s the reason I don’ sell wildlife and made it a point to make a greenhouse in the caravan.

Wildlife is just as precious as m’ own.”

“Believe me, I understand what it feel like to be deigned by the judgment of Humanoids.

It's mostly the fur and horns…”

a man in a plaid shirt is holding a bottle of liquid and says this is t-rex pee ALT: a man in a plaid shirt is holding a bottle of liquid and says this is t-rex pee

||:

If he's insisting he doesn't have “extract” on fuzzy hand already…

Well, he'd be professionally offended.

Tricks of the trade and life.

Good thing he has a scroll for talking with creatures…

𝗕𝗲𝗿𝗻𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗲. . . ?

You can't outrun them.

Name: Church Grimm
Species: Utahraptor ostrommaysi
Age: 20
Length: 6m (26ft)
Height: 1.5m (5'1)
Weight: 500kg (1,100lb
Sex: Male

You can only pray they aren't hungry when they find you.

any preferences, please don' be shy and let me know!"

the best keepers of time, and Dwarvish methods will forge the best outta ya.

Not t' mention their brews are t' die fer."

He waved his wand as a shiny pair of new looking sabatons walked in midair towards the pair of them.

"I learned how to lace in comforting inserts and padding, so if ye have --

He nodded and took a measuring tape from one of his pouches around his belt. With impressive flexibility, he leaned over in an arch and measured his sabatons, humming a tune as he took note of the measurements.

"I took a good pair of summers to learn proper cordwaining from Dwarves. Elves are not--

||: All good :D

"Are they an authority of some kind?"

“Too much lack o’ scenery fer me.”

“Whats tha’?”

||: The dichotomy of creation and creator.

“…Oh WILDSPACE.”
His face scrunched as he twitched his nose.

“Not m’ favorite place to travel…”

"It has many glorious hues for sure..."
He took a sip of the sweet wine, a satisfied smile on his face.

"Would ye like to trade inquiries? I have so many more for you!"

"Two hundred and fifty gold coin or pieces, then."

His ear twitched and Eoin shot upright. He shook the dirt out of his head hair and looked around.

He looked down and saw the guardian tripped over.

"Y' alright down there?"

He thought bought investigating where to find this rare stone later. He raised a brow at the mention of ‘Space.’”
“‘Space?’ Whose space? Where is this space?”

He shrugged.

“Yer loss.”

“Woah… Missed that historical text.”

an ad for expendables 2 shows a man wearing a hat ALT: an ad for expendables 2 shows a man wearing a hat

||: Gonna heat up my leftovers and get to replies!