Dwayne

Is there a code for your server to cut off your friend? I thought no mas was enough. Apparently I’m wrong again.

I thought my summertime depression was behind me. I can’t remember how to dig myself out.

When I was a kid we lived in Mexico for a bit because my dad had a job there. One day on my way home from school I was kidnapped and bundled into a jeep to be ransomed. The kidnappers left me at a petrol station 30 minutes away because I wouldn't stop singing, which annoyed them.

Sometimes I have no idea what I’m doing here

Wife picked our daughter's name when she was born - Saila. I've held it in for 16 years until the first time she came home drunk this weekend and I got to sing what shall we do with a drunken sailor at her. Then she threw up on my wife's slippers. It was worth the wait.

10 summers ago I had a vertical sleeve gastrectomy. I said I was buying 10 more years to see my kids grow up. Ten years and they’re grown. Now shit.

I always tear off the part that says “sharing”

I hope my friends know I’m obsessed with them and want them to have a good day

Gee, I wonder what happened in January of this year to make the dollar lose its value so precipitously . . .

Something has gotta give. I don’t wanna live like this anymore.

A cavern in a cavern

If you're not gassing up your friends, why the fuck not?

heat advisory: how 'bout you cool your jets

moon, oh the moon...
#photography

Sunrise, this morning

My favorite person. I’m going to marry this man someday.

We’re going to adopt Humpty Dumpty

nothing better in life than to be the rhythm guitarist turning to face the drummer during a solo

Did you see the Big Dipper?

Congratulations!

I want to go swimming in the shade.

Sophia forgot her sunglasses so Boris the boar had to try them on.

The Burning Giraffe

The Burning Giraffe

Love that shirt

Lovely

I’ve never regretted going to my reunions no matter how small. You should go