Tim Talbott

The US is at war with Iran, gas prices are going up and the DOW is going down but there is some good news SEND HELP is still in theaters! Enjoy the escape.

Everything is accelerating at an increasing rate and slowing to a standstill at the same time.

I mostly use it to clean my bathrooms

If you are ever impressed with my productivity, please understand that everything I accomplished I did because I was furiously avoiding doing some other task that I absolutely still have not done.

You have succinctly described the creative process.

I accidentally sprang back this weekend and now I’m unmoored from time

Generally not a fan of endless sequels and reboots, but this is an adaptation of an existing anthology, and the lead actor is age-appropriate and then some

Also: Christopher McQuarrie does not make bad movies

This is all I have ever wanted.

It's tough to be us.

But awesome.

Same.

I’ve often wondered what it would be like to have flaws.

I know it's not as horrific as a tan suit, but the President of the United States wore a fucking ball cap to honor the return of the remains of U.S. soldiers killed in battle. That happened.

Class will always out.

Just heard a guy call in to a classic rock station to request Hotel California. This is like sending a letter to the McDonald's corporation asking them to serve hamburgers.

Trump wouldn’t take his stupid baseball hat off during the dignified transfer of the six soldiers we recently lost in Kuwait.

This is disgusting, but also a tacit admission of just how horrible and indefensible it is.

Opened a PDF of a script. Adobe suggested creating an AI summary of the script since it's a long document.

FUCK OFF!

#screenwriting #film

I love the feeling of breathing.

When did I die?

Wouldn't you rather have had healthcare?

THE SHINING is a horror movie because it depicts a writer having to get a part-time job.

Kristi Noem Reassigned To Scarecrow Role At USDA

Kristi Noem Reassigned To Scarecrow Role At USDA https://theonion.com/kristi-noem-reassigned-to-scarecrow-role-at-usda/

Screenshot of a Deadline story announcing my new series.

Here we go!

Who wants to tell the WH “Tropic Thunder” is a spoof on narcissistic fake tough guys?

Props to @benstiller.redhour.com for calling it out. Never go full war monger.

Wow, do I fucking hate every single thing about this.

I love stacked vocals.

Someone should tell Gen Z men misogyny is a big ol’ vagina dryer. Good luck getting laid, Gen Z men!

Yeah, Orwell said that. I think it's the opening line of his famed "Homage to Catatonia." In his first novel, "The Road To Cory's Leer," he also wrote, "Some things seem to look good from one end of the bar, but if you get close and there's just lip filler and hair extensions? Run the fuck away..."

“BREAKING: The United States has threatened to drop their biggest bomb on Iran. B-52s are being loaded with DVDs of the Melania documentary.”

Noem is out. So he's replacing the puppy killer with a man dumber than a box of rocks. Of course that's what he's doing.

Let’s be clear, “Markwayne”
Is not a human name. It is clearly a witch’s curse.