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Jared Johnson is

@jaredparker

Former Christian fundie trying to redirect his idealism toward more humane ends. Black lives matter. Trans lives matter. John Hodgman once told me I was just daddin’ it up. he/him

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19.09.2023
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Latest posts by Jared Johnson is @jaredparker

"Oh but the signs are performative, it's just virtue-signalling, it's cringe" maybe, but I'd rather be walking around a neighborhood with In This House signs than trump signs. The jargon doesn't do anything for anyone though

11.03.2026 17:00 👍 1090 🔁 68 💬 29 📌 27

I’ve seen enough Love is Blind to know this is not true

11.03.2026 23:59 👍 101 🔁 14 💬 0 📌 0

I’m the cat that looks like it was generated by AI

12.03.2026 14:11 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Features — Kaleb Horton

NEW to Kaleb Horton’s archive: his obituary for Charles Portis in Slate, a review of Johnny Cash’s 1994 album ‘American Recordings’ in Pitchfork, an elegy for Pioneer Chicken in theLAnd, and all of his podcast recordings.

www.kalebchorton.com/features

12.03.2026 01:53 👍 31 🔁 13 💬 1 📌 0
My husband and | just received 13 traffic violations in the mail 2 of them were from STOP SIGNS.
IS THIS A NORMAL OCCURRENCE IN DC?!??
Is there a lot of success in getting these things cancelled?! We just moved here and have been going with the flow of traffic! This is INSANE
$1500 worth of infractio

My husband and | just received 13 traffic violations in the mail 2 of them were from STOP SIGNS. IS THIS A NORMAL OCCURRENCE IN DC?!?? Is there a lot of success in getting these things cancelled?! We just moved here and have been going with the flow of traffic! This is INSANE $1500 worth of infractio

i can't stand nextdoor but i think it's fascinating that out of 137 commenters about 120 are like "yeah it sucks to drive in dc" and the handful remaining are patiently explaining that the one weird trick to not getting tickets is to stop driving like an asshole

12.03.2026 12:47 👍 1183 🔁 81 💬 50 📌 13
Post image

The press called Betty Shabazz, Coretta Scott King, and Myrlie Evers "the widows." Between them, they held six degrees, ran three national institutions, raised sixteen children alone, and spent a combined sixty years fighting for justice their husbands didn't live to see.

12.03.2026 12:10 👍 304 🔁 127 💬 4 📌 5

We’re now on year 10 of fawning articles about fucking idiots sticking forks in electrical outlets and saying “wha happun?” the moment it hurts

12.03.2026 13:04 👍 558 🔁 54 💬 7 📌 1

Absolutely aghast at the idea of someone reading everything else in the Guardian but not reading the best part of the Guardian

12.03.2026 12:30 👍 796 🔁 65 💬 29 📌 1

Whoever is the next Secretary of State is going to have some big shoes to fill.

11.03.2026 17:55 👍 1697 🔁 204 💬 46 📌 19

every day we get closer to elon musk promising to dig a tunnel to solve this problem

12.03.2026 04:40 👍 652 🔁 51 💬 30 📌 2

And then crashing out on the first public figure to tell him his idea won’t work and calling them a pedophile

12.03.2026 05:04 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

She is not a centrist. She's endorsed universal healthcare and she's one of the most ardently pro-trans rights politicians in America. If you think she's a centrist you're direly misinformed and you have got to educate yourself before you keep posting stupid shit about there being no good choices.

12.03.2026 03:03 👍 207 🔁 31 💬 6 📌 0

since 2020 my actual CBT therapist has been like "You have to have perspective" but last Friday when I asked her how she was she sighed deeply and said "You know...this country. The world" and I was like finally she gets it. i win the game of therapist

12.03.2026 04:36 👍 136 🔁 5 💬 2 📌 0

If you're a therapist how do you deal with everyone coming in telling you they're in a bad mood because of the government every day

12.03.2026 03:28 👍 970 🔁 77 💬 51 📌 20

We are talking about the same cops who look at a white, powdery substance, call it fentanyl, then immediately collapse and get better medical care for their induced hysteria than most people get for an actual real medical event

12.03.2026 04:37 👍 238 🔁 47 💬 9 📌 0

when you’re arguing about politics here on bluesky just remember there’s a young sheldon spinoff called george and mandy’s first marriage that’s watched by millions of people

12.03.2026 01:22 👍 4952 🔁 513 💬 251 📌 178

who called it an american express credit card statement instead of an ae iou

11.03.2026 22:34 👍 426 🔁 99 💬 13 📌 2
Post: calling “you’re so brave” or “i hold space for trans people” or “my self work involves decentering cisnormativity” style rhetoric that is ultimately contentless and divorced from real concerns allyslop

Reply: In This House signs, an allyslop classic

Post: calling “you’re so brave” or “i hold space for trans people” or “my self work involves decentering cisnormativity” style rhetoric that is ultimately contentless and divorced from real concerns allyslop Reply: In This House signs, an allyslop classic

I feel like these are two different things, the In This House signs are a way for normal people to signify that they support trans/minority rights while the jargon is a way to tell people you've spent time in activist/academic circles

11.03.2026 16:56 👍 1325 🔁 114 💬 115 📌 105

Yep. Classic low-trust-society-meets-untrustworthy-capitalist-system problem

11.03.2026 17:10 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

I feel like the way to combat this is a clinic in every neighborhood with docs who form relationships with the community. System most people are subject to now, it's no wonder they don't trust medical professionals.

11.03.2026 17:03 👍 1 🔁 1 💬 1 📌 0

the promise of AI, at best, is that it can help you "do more"

doing more sucks

embrace the ideology of "fewer, better things"

11.03.2026 16:27 👍 100 🔁 13 💬 5 📌 1

Don't worry, the President's worst impulses on war are being checked by his advisors who are afraid to tell him that the shoes he gave them are the wrong size

11.03.2026 16:31 👍 647 🔁 166 💬 13 📌 5

People say genius can't be rushed but I think what isn't pointed out nearly enough is that non-genius also shouldn't be rushed. Non-geniuses are no less entitled to a personal quota of idle wandering, breaks to consume cake, staring blankly out a window and taking 11 days to reply to a text message.

11.03.2026 10:57 👍 160 🔁 33 💬 6 📌 2

This is Vangelis erasure

11.03.2026 16:08 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
text message screenshot: message 1 “Heads up — a huge branch fell off the tree over the driveway, I moved most of it to the front yard and we are putting in a ticket, but you might back over some small branches” message 2 “The world is falling apart”

text message screenshot: message 1 “Heads up — a huge branch fell off the tree over the driveway, I moved most of it to the front yard and we are putting in a ticket, but you might back over some small branches” message 2 “The world is falling apart”

texting with my upstairs neighbor

11.03.2026 15:59 👍 222 🔁 8 💬 4 📌 0

General announcement to literally everyone: you enjoyed being in your 20s not because the world was better, but because you were at your most attractive, physically capable, and at a peak of both personal freedom and lack of responsibility for others.

11.03.2026 11:23 👍 458 🔁 58 💬 31 📌 49

Unfortunately, yes

11.03.2026 16:01 👍 3 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0

like, attention from progressive media to the race could have helped Stratton close the fundraising gap much earlier. where the fuck were you?

11.03.2026 16:00 👍 31 🔁 4 💬 3 📌 0
Preview
How Illinois May Bumble Its Way Into Electing a Senate Moderate The battle for Dick Durbin’s seat in a potential blue-wave cycle should be a progressive cakewalk in a state like Illinois. Cue the infighting and undermining.

I'm glad the nation is pointing out that krishnamoorthi is bad, but I also feel like "ha ha Illinois is fucking up" seems like a shitty take when you, a major progressive media outlet, failed to write about the race until a week before the election?! www.thenation.com/article/poli...

11.03.2026 15:59 👍 77 🔁 20 💬 2 📌 1

Okay

11.03.2026 15:37 👍 2 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0