Jessi

day 19 out of ?

day 18 out of ?

have to pay the admin fee for the ESTA twice because my autistic ass took the "do you have a physical or mental disorder" question at face value and accidentally flagged myself as a threat

Modern Hysteria

Modern Hysteria, a poem by me

(spoken word video in the replies)

#TraumaNotPD
#PDintheBin
#BPD

i have a silly little hat and i love it

day 17 out of ?

went on a spooky photo taking walk and there was a strange cryptid lurking in the shadows

thank you, it's so difficult i feel like nothing i try amounts anything and they just try to tell me it's different to how ive been experiencing it

i've recently been put under adult social care so hopefully if i mention and then someone can help, who knows at this point🥲

faff about for a few months deliberating about how i need therapy, then refusing, me trying to reason, until we've done that for long enough and they head to discharge again, and repeat

i'm gonna make a note of this info because i don't have any care plan as far as i'm aware, when i was discharged from hospital in february there were all these promises of how it would continue with cmht, just went back to the same as always, randomly seeing the worker once a month,

i only get given one 200mg tablet so it would be hard to do

i just want it to be lowered from 200 to 150 but i can't even get to speak directly to a consultant🥲

saying that, i don't even know who my consultant is

it's so shit having to be stuck on antipsychotics that make you feel shit because you're not allowed to lower it and stopping taking it isn't an option.

i really need my antipsychotic lower, how it makes me feel physically (like shit) is already making me avoid taking it at the time of night that i should, not allowing me to lower it doesn't bode well

supposedly because there's no role for therapy

at the end of my appointment today i asked for everyone (2 staff plus my dad) to let me take my time reading this out

my voice shook but i said every word, and every word from 4 months ago is STILL just as true

that was, in a word, Bullshit

they team point blank won't allow me to reduce my antipsychotic even though i've requested to because it makes my palpitations a lot worse

still no therapy after i plead my case again, with my dad in the room too

they want to discharge me

thank you

cmht this afternoon

there aren't enough words to convey how much i don't wanna face it

day 16 out of ?

day 15 out of ?

day 14 out of ?

day 13 out of ?

day 12 out of ?

(i forgot to post it here yesterday)

day 11 out of ?

day 10 out of ?

first ever wheelchair accessible gig LFG

day 9 out of ?