the struggle of reading m/m or f/f smut is sometimes halfway through it i don’t know which “he”/“she” put their arm where and i have to pause to figure out the position

i have a horrible feeling that i will die before i experience a life that isn’t falling apart constantly

the amount of times i have eaten pasta in the last 3 yrs of trying to save money is probably unprecedented in human history. im pretty sure im 90% pasta by now.

how life feels when you find a longfic with good writing and the exact tags you like

good news: i got shot

how it feels to promo your own fics/art:

LOL true

the weather is so nice i am feeling the seasonal depression leaving my body as we speak (i only have regular depression now)

searching ao3 for hours and not finding the thing you want to read

don’t ever lose sight of what’s important in life (the two fictional characters in your mind that keep you going)

i just got straightbaited (watched a show because people were shipping a m/f couple and didn’t realize it’s not canon)

oh i am sure i just don’t think i ever consciously thought about it for smut because i guess the image of the dick itself is not super clear in my mind, it’s more about feelings/sensations for me

same i don't think i realized that until fandom takes came in ahhaha

i don't think i have ever stopped mid-smut to wonder whether there is a foreskin or not but maybe that's just on me not liking dick i guess? lol

i'm very intrigued as to why the foreskin was so important to this story

and now i am pretty much completely “useless” in the sense that physically there’s just very little i can do most days, and while SOME people did leave i noticed that the people who love me are… still here.

a mortifying result of my trauma is that anytime i am sick or need help i start apologizing repeatedly and asking if the person needs anything, which earned a laugh from ER doctors because i was in a desperate state but still asked the person who was with me if they were ok lol

if there’s any silver lining to becoming disabled overnight: i spent my entire life associating how useful i was to “earning love”, but now that my body has collapsed i finally experienced being loved&taken care of while unable to contribute in any way.

writing fanfiction is so much easier when you have a good beta reader but it’s so hard to find someone who’s able do it and also into the same tropes/characters you are

fandoms would be so much better if everyone was a little nicer

someone tell me it’s not just me

cried so hard that i fell unconscious from the stress i guess? so that’s a fun new thing

yeah id def have left it already otherwise 😂 bsky is much nicer

LOL

i get paid from the verified badge! but it’s not a crazy amount & it’s def not worth ragebaiting for it lol. i just do the same posts except sometimes twitter decides to pay me for it

someone just paid me $3 to hate on me 😭 LOL

it’s insane because the same post on bluesky will be immediately understood by everyone with no fuss but on twitter people will REFUSE to understand it and get thousands of likes out of it too