Rob Adam.

Actually just found where I'd written my password down. After 3 weeks. Glad to be back. X

With a broken heart I have wish Catherine Kelliher rests in peace. She was just so cool & a great online friend for over a decade. Slainte you fantastic lady for all those smiles over the years. My heart goes out to her family & friends. x

Especially if you're crossing the road to fly your kite by pylons .

Was it today's high winds, torrential rain or floods that burnt my piss today? No! It was fucking big spikey conkers .. + a few acorns but mainly Big Fucking Spikey Conkers .. like they'd be watching drone wars & up'd their evil cuntish game level to kill Old Goths. #Twats

I prefer those crisp bright Autumnal days. This shit show of gloomy dreary miserly shit burns my piss. Anyone fancy a G&T?

What travesty is this? A translucent instead of a Blue bag? It's a cruel evil world. I'm mortified. Childhood ruined. Fuck you Walkers.

#LateFootballResults
Saxon City 2 : 2 Viking Utd
Celtic Druid Utd 0 : 0 Pompeii town
Sparta Spears 3 : 3 Egyptian Chariots
Mongol Wombles 0: 3 Goth Albian

Plague Cup 1st round.
Leper vale 0 : 0 Dysentery City
(Match abandoned due extensive begging in the pie shop)

I'm only 5"8 & I'm proud to say that I'm an actual inch taller than the 1000's of displaced Japanese, pacific rim people etc who worried about a 5"7 #tsunami (It's hardly God fucking Zilla is it?) #justsaying #Millennials

I bought the Metallica range of paint brushes. The largest is far too big and makes a terrible mess, but nothing else splatters.

Watching Hannah Fry's Secret Genius of the air fryer. I've already Ninja'd bacon tacos & battered chicken balls. It's only 7:30 am.

If you gave a million Shakespeares a million typewriters, would they eventually come up with the complete works of The Monkees?

#LunchPun

I took Opa (90) to Aldi Lidl & Tesco & then for a Pint today. Lillz & Nanan were sick. Opa even bought Nanan Flowers. This went wide of the mark when she saw all the other shit he'd bought. (I bailed before the biscuit situation became under scrutiny)

Bloke next door is trying to mow his lawn after getting back from holiday. Every 5 feet he hits another hidden kids toy. There's much effing and jeffing going on. 😂

Lately I've rediscovered my taste for Rum. Also ALESTORM & then started rewatching those Pirate Depp movies. Imagine my surprise when my drunken internet shopping delivered a 4" jolly fucking Rodger. #true lol

Has a great big fuck off G&T. #GoMe

I finish work in half an hour. I also have a fridge full of beer. I may get in the fridge with the beer. 🤘😎🌞

TBH Who'd want to drink with those twats anyway.

Me & Lillz took Opa (90) Lidl today. Nanan (86) needed some peace. Brought her back a Greggs Sausage Roll. Took Opa to KFC drive -thu then for a pint. It made both of their days. Lillz make's me proud helping me out.

Has anyone on my TL been to #Warwick ? Lillz bestie does Uni there & has invited her for a sleepover at her digs. Which leaves her unpaid taxi-dad looking for lodgings & something to do. Please help ( carparks, weird shops, theatre galleries parks?) Failing all of these I'm happy with a sleaze pit.

Top Smile! Have a lovely day! :)

Soooo jealousssss #scrumy :)

I bought these today. Ribbed for her extra pleasure on whatever her favourite Graslok tastes like.

Get the f**k in! :)

I've been trying to make my mind up about my favourite Depeche mode song ... but it's no good.

Calzone is perfect. At least he won't be topping himself in the near future.

Yes , Also Bottles at £3.50 a pop

As the BBC see fit to pay Bruce Parry to travel to exotic locations and get utterly spannered. Maybe they'd like to meet me on the 2nd floor of the local Tesco car park later - where I'll be necking Spesh and Frosty Jack with the indigenous tribesfolk - and throw me a few quid?

If that genius fails .. threaten them with Hi-de-Hi.

Today I've discovered the cold hearted way Chinese furry animals are smothered in transit to destroy the dreams of Western Children.

Just installed these crazy machines 😎