rat with the devil horns 🤘🐀🤘

he allowed my mom to take ONE item from the house along with just a bunch of junk and things of her father’s…with blood still on it.

we’re fairly certain he either killed or orchestrated his own father’s death, and maybe even his brother. we’ve never gone back. i get a weird feeling thinking about playing in the underground tunnels on the mountain with my cousin. maybe one day we’ll learn the truth. something ain’t right

then my maternal grandfather’s FATHER “shot” himself in his 80’s the day after christmas and my mother’s uncle started selling farm equipment and shit IMMEDIATELY, then at the viewing coerced her into signing away any inheritance until we felt unsafe and just wanted to GTFO

feel like dropping some crazy ass lore: my maternal grandfather was a (good) pilot and crashed his own plane in the mountains and his brother is the one who found him after a big search and rescue and later became a millionaire in rural arkansas and built tunnels under his mansion on the mountain

i wanna go home and sleep i’m in grave danger of snapping at my boss

lost health insurance, forbearance on student loans denied, no one else will hire me so i can stop driving back to my hometown that’s practically a war zone, gas is over $3, i’m too depressed to draw for money and it rarely sells when i do, what is even the point

i hope i can afford my meds without insurance because i’m just 1 bad interaction away from intentionally getting myself fired today since nothing matters anyways. autistic meltdown incoming

hikaru & tanaka officially have names

that is a gremlin

“why i oughtta”

sable burmese, 2 copies of burmese so he’s extra dark

he’s molting atm but i think his coloration will stay fairly dramatic

who is this diva

(his name is bear)

i’m so tired i can’t believe i almost just took a swig of germ-x to down a pill

I got carried away, but it did make me happy.

#b3d #gameart #lowpoly

new mini batch of rat adoptables up for instant purchase at ko-fi.com/murdermuffin...

apologies for making them $12 instead of $10 fees suck...

if only lol it’s just the basket 😩

the goldens are a variety i never thought i’d own since i rarely if ever saw them buuut i got lucky enough to test drive these new lines as the breeder’s friend lol i’m very excited/nervous

quoll bear and thing 1 & thing 2

bear looks like weej 🥲

bear looks like a darker ouija that was my silent wish he is GORGEOUS

*siamese but he is currently a siamess

sable burmese - bear
golden marten - ?
golden siamess - ?

they have been acquired

do i even wanna talk about the bible camp i was forced to attend after i identified with atheism…boarded up windows, no clocks, adults refusal to acknowledge times of day to better focus on lessons, jelly beans in pill containers, a dark candlelight closing ceremony walking down an aisle of people 🫩

that was definitely a cult and i’m glad i had limited interactions with those hateful nutjobs including my dead stepfather’s mother who i no longer see. her behavior and treatment of us even outside of the church was disturbing and certainly sped up my conclusion to atheism lol

being forced to go to our methodist church every sunday was more or less tolerable even after i was firmly a closeted atheist in the deep south. but the hellfire and brimstone missionary baptists (my other “grandparents”) were horrible. people treated us like shit for being another denomination?

my brain relies on hard logic and the more i read the actual bible and learned of its history it no longer made any logical sense. and how could i rely on a book where a table of men chose what chapters were put in or left out? an insanely cult-like bible camp cemented my horror and disdain for life

everything is awful inside and outside of my head but at least i get to meet babies tomorrow i guess unless that goes horribly wrong also

oh to be born in an age where we could’ve been the happiest and most comfortable in all of the history of mankind but we had to watch it all sail by bc of some old fucks