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09.03.2026 20:16
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Reform fury as someone else wins by Our By-election Editor Tim Shipsink The losing candidate in the Gorton and Denton by-election, Matt Goodwhinge, has demanded an immediate re-run of the election on the grounds that he lost comprehensively to someone else. "It's totally unfair and rigged," said Goodwhinge. "I shouldn't be required to sit there and suck it up, just because I lost." Mr Goodwhine continued, *I can't believe that all those voters I demonised failed to back me. Especially after I was endorsed by Tommy Robinson and ten million Russian bots on X. "We have clear evidence of family voting, where people voted in order for me to stop deporting their families." Mr Badloser concluded. "I'm the victim of colour prejudice. They didn't vote for me simply because I'm not green." Reform leader Mr Farage, speaking from a sun lounger on a rock near the Chagos Islands said, "It's a tragedy that the people of Manchester won't see Matt in Westminster, but my constituents don't see me in Clacton either." PLUMBER DEFEATS MATT GOODWIN Photo of Hannah Spencer with speech bubble saying… I've stopped the cock
Beautiful from Private Eye on the massive toddler-tantrum that Matt Goodwin and Reform are having, because they got whooped in Gorton and Denton.
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I see the papers which screamed ‘tAKe bACK ConTRol’ now want the UK to be nothing but an obedient servant of the USA
"We called London a war zone and moved to Dubai by mistake"
The ‘Board of Peace’ started World War 3 so fast.
He was my mums favourite singer too ❤️ we went to see him a few years back at the London Palladium. He will always be associated with our Mums ❤️❤️
Yes. Ted often does this in the early hours 😩
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Wishing you all the best with your heart surgery ❤️
Thank you ☺️
It's almost like being fabulously rich doesn't make you happy or well adjusted. It's almost like it makes you sad and lonely. And leaves you forever casting about for scapegoats to offset your deep self-loathing. Thank you Jim Ratcliffe and Elon Musk for these important life lessons.
"I have decided that I won't be firing myself"
Purrfect 🧡🤍
What's most amazing about this is the fact that the WSJ needed a “study” to figure it out.
I love seeing all the new shoots 🌱
Thats always what I think 😂
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#CatsOfBluesky #Caturday #Cats
They owe her, and all of us, an apology.
I’m no expert, but has anyone tried to throw holy water on him?
The Western Pygmy Petaur (Cercartetus concinnus), one of Australia's smallest marsupial 🐾
Those ears ❤️🥹❤️
It is imperative that whatever action Europe takes, we take together.
The tectonic plates are starting to shift.
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To understand the fear of ICE in the UK, imagine arming those boneheads who demonstrated outside migrant hotels and giving them carte blanche to do as they want.
Joint statement on Greenland.
Wrote this last January about Trump and Greenland. Feels like it’s where we are heading. Too many Europeans just haven’t been listening to them because it’s been too disturbing to confront the potential reality.
open.substack.com/pub/goodalla...
Pips gave her rescuers the runaround for hours. To see her now – calm, comfortable, completely blissed out with Keeper Fred – is a wonderful transformation.
Her mother was likely killed by lions. Pips miraculously escaped the same fate.
swt.bio/pips
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