The Ides of Dave

I know, makes the $45 totally wasted

Point of order, if you do go to the aquarium, don't eat the fish.

But where would you put them?

Traveling to Boston on Monday. If you have any recs for stuff to do in Back Bay, hit me with them. But Back Bay only. It is not my first time in Boston and I do not like going further than two miles when I travel. (Like I already took a plane? That’s enough) Thanks!

15 inches!? That's like 2* penises.

*Or 3, depending on who is measuring

I guess if it's in the project plan, ya gotta shit your pants!

Meme of Jeffrey Epstein holding a sign that reads: “Don’t get distracted!!!”

‼️🚨BREAKING🚨‼️
Our enemies are not in Iran, Venezuela, or Cuba. They are in the Epstein files!

Changing underwear at lunch? Stop eating Taco Bell for breakfast.

Friday the 13th, in this economy?

Top Football free agent signings so far...
1. Trump is a rapist

A woman in dark green athletic wear stretches at a ballet barre in front of a mirror.

A woman in olive green athletic wear performing a downward dog yoga pose on a wooden floor.

A screenshot of a nomination page for "Best Fitness Instructor," featuring Stephanie Stabenow from re/barre & Meraki. The entry is circled in pink with a "BFF" heart sticker added over it.

Hey y’all, I rarely ask for favors on here, but can you do me a huge one? Please nominate my best friend Stephanie Stabenow for Best Fitness Instructor!
She’s under “Self-Care + Health” for re/barre and Meraki. Let’s help her win! 🗳️🙂🩷 dailyinterlake.secondstreetapp.com/Best-of-Whit...

gave in and joined this trend

2 totally unrelated headlines. Totally.

Instead of the long list of things they didn't think of before starting a war, here is a comprehensive list of the things they did think of:

1. Trump is a rapist
2.
3.
4.
5.

Woke up to snow in Minnesota, might be a long 9 days

Don't forget to hump the day.

I love a week where both Darryl Hannah and Rosanna Arquette speak up about men who are jerks.

I don't think he was driving, but could be!

Twice this week, while I've slowed and stopped at a light going yellow to red, a car behind me has switched lanes to go around me and sped through a fully red light. In both cases, I caught up to them at the next light. People are in a hurry to be stupid.

Did they run out of schnitzel?

Whether you agree with Timothée Chalamet about ballet and opera or not, Trump is still a rapist.

In my dream, Daniel Craig had to put on a silly wig before leaving the house because the townspeople didn't want him there. But first I had to feed the chickens and deal with an insect infestation in the attic.

Same.

Therapy? Why yes, I believe I need therapy.

Trump raped children
#epsteinfiles
#notdistracted

Are you my mother?

I love Jessie Buckley and Christian Bale was also great, but The Bride! Is a narrative mess.

does anybody really know what time it is?
(Care) does anybody really care?
(About time) you know, I can't imagine why
(Oh no, no) we've all got time enough to cry

I am both of a creeping age and an aging creep.