paul de revere

she’s right you know

I stole some sunglasses just yesterday

you do not have to do racism to experience “the frisson of transgression” you can simply shoplift an eyeliner pencil or cheat on your husband instead

Here come those diablo winds baby

“what up twin”

if it’s neilsen they send a paper mail and have you fill out a form online if I recall correctly that’s the communique I received from them last year

this ain’t the average american this is the average boomer!

I'm going to run for office on something batshit like "make all cops volunteer like the fire men"

I was over on x dot com scoping out things to talk about on youtube dot com and across a unique and cunning plan for dealing with the strait of hormuz

It’s one banana, San Francisco. What could it cost? Ten dollars. And you can get it dipped in chocolate from Go Bananas in Dolores Park on a sunny day.

Congratulations to San Francisco for inventing the long-prophesied banana that costs ten dollars sfstandard.com/2026/03/11/g...

wrong

I hear they're feeding the marines lobster-flavored crayons tonight

Happy Birthday Jizz say it back

Iranian sleepycels are in your area doing a honk shoo mimimi

hbd jizz

The trailer for EVERYONE IS LYING TO YOU FOR MONEY. In select theaters starting April 17th 🍿🤑🤣

a Hemingway style sentence of ominous vibes

dog rescue event at mar a lago

people really like me until they really don’t

oh sorry that dudes are rocking

poor babby :(

Iranian sleepycels are in your area taking a little nap

I’m in this photo tag me next time brendel

My neighbor told me Iranian mines keep eating his ships so I asked how many ships he has and he said he just goes to the port and gets a new ship afterwards so I said it sounds like he's just feeding ships to mines and then his daughter started crying.

this cat got milkshake ducked because it turns out he only tipped 10%

you like humans? have you ever seen the inside of one? disgusting

starling (seth rogen): if you could take this survey that would be so awesome. i could get out of your hair before this guy's done jacking off.

hannibal lecter (danny mcbride): motherfucker that's miggs. me and him are boys, so you better watch yourself. i'm behind this glass cause i ate some dudes

movie is such a great name for them. yeah they do

I listen to the news 16 hours a day. I am also mentally ill