Poetry
20.02.2026 13:57
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Poetry
I'm new to this, but it seems the best part of going to the gym is your trainer texting in sick.
'I Spilled My Soda,' Report Nation's Dopes
'I Spilled My Soda,' Report Nation's Dopes https://theonion.com/i-spilled-my-soda-report-nations-dopes-1819572671/
Olympic skiing puts so much white on the pub TV that you can see the CP24 burn-in.
Whether it's Barack Obama asking for Dijon mustard or Donald Trump mocking a recently murdered film director, both presidents shattered Washington norms.
Eminem?
I’d rather have another shot than rip this bandaid off my hairy arm.
I got better
there is no one on this earth you should respect less than a politician who claims Canadian cities are terrifying war zones. like awwww, are you afraid of Halifax, Nova Scotia? it's okay, little buddy, that cannon they fire downtown is a show for tourists, it isn't real
Pro-tip: If you're running a text/keyword based contest, don't use "end" as one of your keywords. It's a command and does stuff. #oops
Pro-tip: If you're running a text/keyword based contest, don't use "end" as one of your keywords. It's a command and does stuff. #oops
New fun
In Canada: Universal Music Canada’s Julie Adam Is Billboard Canada Women in Music’s 2025 Executive of the Year
Tonight my 4-year-old son said the cutest thing! "Daddy, those people on social media who quote their kids saying clever things are obviously lying"
Wise beyond his years.
Helluva week.
“You’re going to hear stuff we don’t usually play this weekend. We’re going to play 3 Nickelback songs, and then NEVER AGAIN!…Well, I guess that makes it 4” -me, all proud of myself.
"Great call, Nostradumbass" is underrated as far as sick burns go.
Furthermore; my hands are also half the size of my wife's entire torso. *yawn*
I don't see what the big deal is; my engagement photos also got 19,000,000 likes within five hours. Big whoop.
Poilievre promises Battle River-Crowfoot if elected they will never see him again
good catch!
YOU DON'T SAY
Really cheapens the whole program.
So three times?
That’s it. Re-do the election.
You win some…
Our emergecy alert system is an embarrassment
Tuesday texts.
Hearing some folks complain that the new Pope is "woke" will be fresh and funny to me every time.
"Wow, this Pope is a real Jesus-following kindness-pushing people lover! I do NOT care for that kind of radical thinking!!!"