Michael Winter

saw this attractive couple on Dupont carrying in their bare hands a few small grocery items with no tote bag, and the man had a carton of six eggs and the way they were talking you could tell they lived together and I wondered if I've ever in my life bought just 6 eggs even when I've lived on my own

sometimes when I type in my password wrong and I'm asked to re-enter it, I say out loud, "Don't be obtuse, you know what I meant."

when you get up in the dark to see the blood moon and stay up and drink coffee and write and then you notice it's dawn and you go around turning off the lamps and you feel like you're in one of those movies where the detectives have been up all night trying to solve a murder

trying to change the ringtone on my phone because this one sounds like urine splashing over windchimes

years ago, when I first got a macbook, I tripped over the power cord & marvelled at how the cord released itself from its magnetic jack without dragging the laptop onto the floor as I'd feared -- now, though, when I trip on the cord of this new macbook it holds its grip & all hell breaks loose.

road salt is one thing, but there are pigeon droppings from a nest above on the door handle to CIBC at Bloor/Dufferin. I thought I was doing the bank a favour by letting them know how filthy their door is, but they don't seem to care, as managers use a side door. #CIBC

my dog will approach other dogs in the dog park and I like to talk to these dogs in my high doggy voice and when we're leaving I'll say to the dog, continuing in my high tone, "See you later, sweetheart!" and then I'll hear the dog owner reply in a normal voice register, "Bye."

visible flapping bandages maybe 2%?

feel like the city is currently made up of 3% zip-ties.

I like to scan the morning skyline of Toronto with binoculars, amazed that modern skyscrapers still puff out smoke from roofs like locomotives, the lit-up logos for TD, Telus, KPMG, the private AI-takeover of Ernst & Young (EY), and then, incongruously, an old-school TIP TOP TAILORS, yay tip-top!

If I Wrote Like Lydia Davis

This is --, he said and started to cry.
What’s wrong with him.
Oh, he just hid his relationship for a year, she left him, now she’s back. He’s just sorry he did that.
Tarnished.
‘Sullied’ is the word he uses.

still thinking about my son's Montreal friend Chad Japeedi who helps him with term papers, how my son laughed and laughed when I asked if I'd ever met Chad.

when I walk the dog I usually am wrapped up in the enormity of existence, meditating on both the marvel and dismay of the world, but other dog walkers remember my dog's name and talk about specific dog things and I'm pummelled verbally into the quotidian which is probably a good thing

I find it sad that those older people who'd like to keep a history of all of their transactions in a little bound book, are being told now to scroll through their phone.

I deposited a cheque at a teller because the ATM rejected it. I signed and she stamped a receipt. I asked if they could give me a new passbook. "We no longer have them." All of the major banks have phased them out. "Even though," the teller said, "a lot of our older clients still ask for them."

if you want to be remembered by someone, give them a pretty little tin or tube of lip balm -- they'll think of you every day

Just learned that Gary Bruce (aka Chase Webster) died last October. He wrote "Moody River", such a mysterious song (as sung by Pat Boone). I had tracked down where Mr Bruce lived in Tennessee and meant to write him a letter about the song, and ask how on earth he wrote it.

I tend to like people who use dotted, though the choice perplexes me

the world can be divided into those who choose to use ruled notebooks and those who prefer blank notebooks

I still hand draw maps on paper of routes I need to take in the car, so was unaware that the 427 is a completely separate highway from the 27. It'd be like if they built a parallel road next to the TCH and called it the Canada Highway.

I chose to stay in the Days Inn by Wyndham Levis because it's almost "Wyndham Lewis" and they said they were pet-friendly but ended up charging me $50 for my dog to stay overnight and that is decidedly pet-hostile. #DaysInn

when choosing a rural place to live, it is worth calculating how close you are to the nearest Napa auto parts store

spent time with men in garages & wondering why novels of the 19c have no scenes set in carriage repair shops, hours of men talking about wheel size, imported spindles and what axles don't break and if a breed of horse eats less oats per mile and has anyone seen if Gary's wagon is behind his house?

It's so cold out the chainsaw stopped working so I put it by the warm woodstove to thaw, because I have to keep cutting firewood to feed the woodstove so that my chainsaw will thaw...

It's my woodstove's birthday and so I split some very dry birch into much smaller chunks so that it could greedily eat their yellow bones without having to gnaw away first at the entire rind. Happy birthday, Jotul!

I've got enough going on with wildfires, leaks, windstorms, keeping an uninsulated house warm, potable water, the last thing I need is a goddamn northern flicker drilling a hole in my eaves, that's why I'm shouting outside up at the corner of my house in the freezing rain

When kids are around me outside and I need to wipe my nose I will press one nostril closed and blow out the other. I first saw an old man do this when I was a kid, I still know his name, and I can't think of anything else he did, but I too wish to be remembered by the young.

have sent my son several cute animal videos and he's had to explain to me how they're all AI-generated, so now I'm reduced to forwarding him only Buster Keaton clips

Don't mind feeling stuck in a cold, windy, rainy house, but when the mousetraps begin to disappear...

currently repairing storm door that was ripped in half and thrown onto ground during latest windstorm -- caught myself thinking my storm door needs a protective door