Goose

I only fear jazzercise

Spending my Monday evening with bit of smooth jazz and brandies. Bap bap, bap-bap. No mention of fpl. Bap. Nice.🪿

Not a bad rank ⬇️🪿

I Gabbed tmy TC right up. Rubbish chip anyway

Oof, I'm just ahead of you.

GW29: 74 (-4)

581k > 498k 🟢

Long time regulars Timber & Dewsbury deliver. My first hit of the season pays off with Salah. Am I just churning points or is this the turning point? Nine weeks left to find out.

With WC, FH & BBBBench Boost to go...

Let's flipping do this! 🪿

Sarrberry jam.

Depends on whether they try another manager by then, but I've got a nice choice between Hugo and that Mo fellow to rival Bruno.

Does anyone know if 'Disk Jockey' is an acceptable occupation for someone witnessing the signing of a legal document these days?

Aww, thanks. Me and my comedy and obvious fpl expertise are going nowhere now.

Good news. I've got the papers. Bad news. I don't seem to have a pen. Finding one is essential if I'm going to buy this house, the haven, the personal space where I can finally have room to plan and what I was put on this earth for. Yes, I'm finally going to win #fpl! Probably not this season. 🪿

I try and keep smug condescension to a minimum and for comical purposes only. The game can get us all at times. It's been a tough old season for many. Hopefully a break does some good.

I made a mistake posting this. In an attempt to claw back popularity lost, I'd like to make the point that I could have gone "Sal-Ahhhh!!!", like fans do with goal kicks sometimes. Didn't though. 🪿

That would count as bench jam for me. I'd be embarrased tbh. Nonetheless, yep, I'm in.

Some things are hard to take in fpl. What makes me feel better is to be happy for those amongst us who have succeeded by, for example, switching Haal to Salah, for a hit no less. And although that's a huge lie, it does look like I'm going to post this out. No. No likes necessary. I understand.🪿

Wow. Some absolutely huge results for the title, champions league qualification and relegation tonight. The Prem League is back! 🪿

Villa v Chelski has got the makings of a classic. Great open game with a good tempo. There's more goals in this one coming up in the 2nd half 🪿

Not in spag bol. I'm not a barbarian. On top or on the side.

Only needs one chance, that lad.

They questioned my sexual performance. They accused me of bad timekeeping. They looked at me when the cutlery went missing. They wondered where I was when my enemies went missing. They asked if I kiss my mama with this mouth, in an offended fashion. Well, well, well, who's f**king laughing now? ⚽️🪿

That's a very negative outlook. Only my own glorious outcome is important thing here.

Penalised with a booking, you mean? I'm outraged.

Oops, that should've been a draft. I could look very silly in a bit.

People doubted me and my players. They said my captain, Salah, was finished. They said I was crazy for taking a hit to bring the King back. They called me immature and very ugly. They said my breath smells like gherkins. They questioned my taste, coleslaw on spag bol, etc. Well, who's laughing now?🪿

Well, would you look at that? Solio backs my captain Salah choice to the max. Now, if only I can get the grass reps in the same room so we can sit down and talk. I'll make tea put biscuits out. We can all be friends. Maybe some day, even best friends. 🪿

I'm no hero. Not just for a day. Let's speak tomorrow.

GW29: 581k rank.

Haal, Wirtz > Eketike, Salah-4

Ten weeks left to defeat the forces of darkness, to triumph over the casuals that lead my mini-leagues, to stop the family members who run their mouths at the first sign of uncertainty. Let no man question the cunning of the engaged manager. 🪿

I'd like to make the following public announcement. I've just made 2 transfers:

Haal, Wirtz > Eketike, Salah. -4.

I can't say anything more and will be deactivating my account if I get any gip. 🪿

Haaland is about to drop in price, sure. Eketike is about to rise, sure. It would be easy to give in to the temptation of making the transfer in the next 45 mins. But we are better than that. We stick to our principles. We don't act without information. We are in this together. Haal captain. 🤝

GW28: 76 points

704k > 581k 🟢

A little win. 🪿