El Borto 🔥🔥🔥

There’s a #WorldKindnessDay but not a #WorldNastinessDay?

Awful people need an outlet too.

“And how would you describe that whole experience, Jill. It’s okay, take your time.”

“As fast as lightning? *Actual* lightning?”

“Your honour, if *everyone* was ‘Kung Fu Fighting’, then how does that explain the numerous people sat down at the bar chatting? It‘s simply a laughable contention.”

Gonna tell my kids skibidi toilet created the necessary conditions for the attacks on the World Trade Center to happen.

9/11 was my personal 9/11.

You literally paid for a tattoo? My brother you could‘ve just used a biro.

Gen Z history text book:

Churchill Unal1ved the Nat-Cs during world c0nflict II 😳🙊🤯😲💀💀💀

Yes I will be calling it ‘Cappy G Tax’ from now on. Thanks for asking.

Joke idea: I pretend that I’m going to buy Oasis tickets even though I only know wonderwall.

Has anyone seen this joke anywhere? I want to know if I’m the first.

There’s not going to be a chilli cook off you stupid slut.

Emily getting heat for this objective correct take.

The ‘tourists vs genuine fans’ talking point is more clear cut when talking about football.

If you don’t think it’s bad that genuine fans miss out to middle class, casuals who go for a few social media posts then I’m not sure what to tell you.

You just know there’s going to be a “name an artist better than Oasis” quote tweet circle-jerk and people will be putting in Billie Eyelash or Arctic Monkeys without a hint of irony.

Are we really going to start comparing Brainstorms to Some Might Say?
A laughing contention.

Thanks for those two songs and all but I could pick half an album that has more of a legacy than any other artist in the past decade would ever have with their entire discography.

And I’m not even including anything off the first two albums. That’s right. I’m leaving them out.

The amount of ODS (Oasis Derangement Syndrome) I’ve seen over the last few days has been truly magnificent. People have actually convinced themselves that they’re complete garbage bar 2 songs. It’s adorable.

Hopefully Liam will go “PUT YOUR FUCKING PHONES AWAY YA CUNTS” and that’ll be the end of the matter.

What if Hitler made some great points? Did you ever consider that?

Why is exam results day even a news story? I want to know about a shadow minister being arrested for tax fraud, or of a coup d'état in central Africa.

No one cares that Jim Speccytwat got a B in physics.

Hopefully not about legal stuff. I hate it when they do that.

It is simply not possible to be Pro-Bean in a Post-Truth society.

“Beans cause penal shrinkage!!!”
‼️✋😫🤚‼️

My brother in Christ it was 1 study.

It’s hard to believe that back then he was ridiculed, mocked and ostracised for saying this.

Only beyond death did his message truly resonate with people, and they continue to do so today.

Where would society be without the guidance of wisdom at great cost?

I got perm banned on Twitter (subsequently known as X) for posting an image of Elon Musk pregnant with Donald Trump’s child with his own AI image generator.

Is it fun over here yet?

I have been perm banned from X formerly known as twitter (again again)

Twitter update:

El Borto is locked up in prison for crimes against toryshites and this poster shows them in prison and the text says free el Borto free the Springfield one inspired by our Deidre who got locked up for war crimes

@leohutz.bsky.social sending this on here as you don't follow me on Twitter 😂

Beautiful 🙏✨

Just went past a market stall in town that said Free Polystyrene.

I think they might be Hamas terrorists.

Kyle Kyle (still alive) still messages me sometimes to talk about channel idents. In fact, the only sustained conversation I’ve ever had with Kyle Jim Kyle (midle name) that wasn’t about channel idents was a meta conversation about why he talks about channel idents so much.

I knew Cheryl’s boyfriend (Kyle Kyle) at University. We used to watch SAS Who Dares Wins together until he jumped off a bridge in 2018 because I karate kicked his 15 year old son by accident after Kungfoo fighting came on Smooth FM.