Luke

sweet dreams, now with no added sugar

Most accurate portrait of modern culture currently available

I hope you have a good joke lawyer

A handicap blue and white painted sign on the asphalt of a parking space. The symbols are meant to be a pregnant women and a baby stroller, but it doesn't look like that. It looks like pac man being killed with scissors next to a dancer

Twerkers at the barbeque get priority parking 🫡

A bunny on his green shag carpet, staring at the ceiling after a long day. His five cats look at him expectantly, wanting to be fed, as their bowls are empty in a corner of the room

Daily bunny no.3251 needs a minute

starbucks barista: order for cathy lou

cthulhu: (visibly incensed) i guess that's me

there's so much bad in the world but there's also people who lift up and carry an elderly bat around every day so he can pretend he's flying again, and that's the part of the world I think is worth fighting for

[after a solid minute of the funeral director staring at us, i repeat]

…bunk coffins

[my wife doing stacked hands motion]

like…double decker

the Super Mary O'Brothers

so then we meet Boromir, who is Aragorn's Wario

I don't wanna know anything about those people

his palms are sweaty-o's
knees weak, arms are heavy-o's
there's vomit on his sweater already-o's

“my husband wants me to dress more like tila tequila” girl, the monsters are loose. you are going to die

A minor league hockey team had a wiener dog race. Zero thoughts, just vibes and absolute chaos. A thing of beauty

here's a collection of blueprints for houses which feels really potentially useful for games archive.org/search?query...

manga panel with a train car with its wheels on two separate tracks, above another panel of someone saying "multi-track drifting!!"

WERNER HERZOG: cast into the wilderness by an uncaring mother, the child must choose a companion, a beast of unnatural capabilities through which to channel his will. they will not rest until every gymnasium lies in ruin.

ASH: where's professor oak

HERZOG: this lizard is on fire

Ash: did I catch 'em all?

doctor: *reading test results* sadly, yes

Ash: where's Pikachu

Misty: I can't wait to try this new fusion restaurant

Brock: I'm so hungry I could eat a Ponyta!

both: *laughing*

Ash: guys

waiter: here's your pikka masala

Ash: no

me: any animal's a Pokemon if you can shove it in a ball and make it figh-

petting zoo security guard: *scoop tackles me*

Choose a Pokemon

why would you wake up and choose violence when you could wake up and

[monkey's paw curls] announcing HBO Again

do you care about trans people?

cool!
cancel your new york times subscription!

oh, but you just play the games? thats the worst argument you could've made!
go fuck yourself!

Fred Flintstone hitting a pothole in his car and snapping his leg in half

me: *half-listening* here's your rubber duck

son: *screaming as I dump the babadook into the bathtub*

life finishes flashing before my eyes while in a hot air balloon crash but theres still 17 minutes until impact

lying serenely in my death bed, at peace, ready. surrounded by my loved ones. telling them that if I find proof of a life beyond this one, I'll send a message back to my body to shit itself

me on deathbed: a squatty potty but for pissing
my kids: you sit down on it?
me: *shakes my head no before dying*

Kevin Nguyen @knguyen ... Tried to add "12 Years a Slave" to Google Calendar and it created a 12-year-long event called "a Slave" • a Slave Tue, February 25, 8pm - Wed, February 25, 2026, 8pm Delete Edit event » 5:27 PM • Feb 23, 2014

It’s finally over

oh my god